Bending and Snapping With Bailey Hanks

Oh my God, you guys. This week's column features my encounter with Bailey Hanks fresh off her being crowned the new Elle Woods in Broadway's Legally Blonde on an MTV reality show I didn't really watch. This may sound reminiscent of the Grease stars having been chosen by similar means, but THEY were picked by the American public and Bailey had to get the nod from expert judges. There's a difference! Anyway, the bouncy southern girl told me all about her steely determination and frothing ambition to do just about anything to get ahead. I was impressed but a tiny bit scared. Most poignantly of all, Bailey dished about her deep, loving, physical bond with her costar--the chihuahua!

Speaking of animal lust, my column also deals with a display of deer copulating in a three-way over at the Museum of Sex. You will gag--but don't try to join in! I tried! I also have some dish on the delectable loves of both Marc Jacobs and Kim Cattrall. And I tried to join in with them too!