Paris Hilton's Romantic Secrets

Paris Hilton seems to have finally clicked with a guy--Good Charlotte's Benji Madden--so I cornered her last week to ask why the relationship seems to be working better than her and Nicole did. "Please explain," I begged the Teflon socialite. "How do you stay a unit without straying? I'm old-school gay and usually can't stay faithful even for two dates." Like a vision from a fractured fairy tale, she smilingly obliged. The secret, Paris said, as if quoting an old issue of Tiger Beat magazine, is "being with someone who's your best friend and who loves you and won't hurt you. Benji and I have that. We're very close and we tell each other everything. I know he won't hurt me and I won't hurt him. There's a karma when people do things in relationships that are mean."

There IS? NOW you tell me! FUUUUCK!!!