What To Expect In An Economically Depressed New York City

*A sudden taste for one-dollar deli coffee
*The Meat Packing District returning to its glory as a haven for rats, trannie prosties, and bagel joints
*Lots more muggers and thieves, as all the rich people who moaned that "New York has lost its edge" double-bolt themselves indoors
*Some sick, twisted, panic-driven nightlife worth unbolting the door for
*Tony Award categories eliminated for lack of five possible nominees
*A reprise of the "I Love New York" ad campaign, once again trying to sugarcoat the desperation
*An end to that annoying phrase, "New York is in a real estate bubble!"


























