Why Michael Jackson Never Married Liz Taylor

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So I'm finally through with Mackenzie Phillips's book, which got a little dull when she cleaned up, and I'm now on to Rabbi Shmuley Boteach's The Michael Jackson Tapes, in which the self-promoting spiritual authority lays out his transcribed 2000-2001 conversations with the noseless king of pop.

In it, Jacko freely discusses the high points of his love life, like how Brooke Shields tried to get intimate with him once, but he didn't go for it--wonder why. Another tragic near-miss is that he never dated Liz Taylor and as a result never got to be one of her thousands of husbands.

As Michael says in the book, "I know that if we ever did anything romantically, the press would be so mean and nasty and call us 'the Odd Couple'. It would turn into a circus and that's the pain of it all. You know, I push her in a wheelchair sometimes when she can't walk. It's none of their business what we have together. I have to be with people like me."

"People like me?" Well, I am going to rise above for a change and totally avoid the "two white women" thought that's totally crossing my mind.


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