Just Say "I Saw It!"

It's so wearying to keep up with all the people buzzing at my face and asking me with penetrating eyes, "Have you seen such and such movie?" and "Did you watch last Sunday's episode of blah blah blah?"

Naturally, for my job, I try to see as much new entertainment as possible, and I end up catching more stuff than virtually anyone on the planet. But occasionally I do miss an off-Broadway marathon or a talk show repeat, and rather than feel inadequate about it, I find it's way easier to simply tell people I saw it!

It's the only reasonable answer unless you want to be badgered with choruses of "You haven't seen yadda-ya? Are you crazy?"

As a result, once painful conversations now go something like this:

"Did you see that opera at the Met last night?"

"Of course! It was amazing!"

"But I heard there were hundreds of walkouts."

"Yeah, um, that's what I meant--amazingly bad!"

"Oh, right. Well, did you happen to catch that three-part cycle of [blah blah] plays in September?"

"Wouldn't have missed it! Definitely worth the cab ride!"

"But it was in Hartford!"

"Um, yeah! I mean it was so good it would have been totally worth cabbing it!"

"Of course it's right here in Manhattan these days."

"Duh! Saw it last night. More amazing than ever!"

"Hmm. So I guess you didn't catch last night's episode of..."

"DVR'd it. Better than Avatar!"

"You already saw Avatar?"

"Amazing!"