My Footwear Crisis Is Finally Resolved

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You know what they say about a guy with big feet: It's hard for him to find shoes that fit!

And though I recently thought I'd solved my oversized feet crisis by nabbing a pair of size 17 bowling shoes, the truth is they hurt like the dickens and what's more, bowling shoes look a little silly with a tuxedo. And if I ever decide to wear a tuxedo, that could be a problem!

But I've finally found the answer. Not the KMart slippers I used to wear, which always fell apart and, when stitched back up by a shoe repairman, became tighter than Mother Theresa's privates.

But Totes! Yes, rubbers!

Normally that kind of thing is supposed to be worn over shoes, but I've been wearing them as shoes, and the great thing is they stretch, they keep my feet warm (as long as I wear four pairs of socks underneath), and if anyone asks why I have them on, I say, "It's supposed to rain later, no?"

Thanks to Totes, I can actually leave the house this winter.



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