My Heart Goes Out To Sandra Bullock

How painful to step to the podium and caress your Academy Award while knowing that you're man is a dog who's playing around with a neo-Nazi motorcycle chick and your personal life has fallen to utter shit.

Similarly, my auricles and ventricles go out to poor Kate Winslet, who's also suddenly faced with an Oscar and no man (or woman, for that matter).

And Charlize Theron, who's currently in the same incredibly awkward situation.

And Abbe Cornish, who reportedly thought Ryan Phillippe had a wandering eye, so SHE wandered away (though it may have been just desserts, based on her past behavior--and his too).

And Elizabeth Edwards, who's dealing with a horrible form of cancer--namely her ex-husband and Rielle Hunter.

GOD, MEN ARE SCUM!!!