Gay Marriage Will Further Oppress Me!

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Oh, don't worry, I'm in favor of it.

It's extremely important we get this in New York so we can have equality in that area and also stick it to the Republicans!

But there's a sense in which gay marriage will add to the oppression of my sad little life.

You see, I've never been a relationship person.

It's hard for someone as rarefied (and bizarre) as myself to find a mate, as you can well imagine, and besides, whenever I do find one, I tend to ward him off with fiery batons, conviced I'd be better off alone.

But in the gay community, I didn't mind being single since I felt connected to my brethren and sistren.

People didn't ask any questions like "Why are you alone?" because they just knew you were gay and having fun and that seemed like a perfectly reasonable option.

But now -- if all goes well -- all the gays are gonna go and get married and create families and no longer will I be able to use "I'm gay" as the reason for being a bachelor.

Having long known what it was like to be the outcast in the mainstream community, I'm also going to get a taste of being the outcast in the gay community.

Plus I'm going to have to buy a lot of blenders!


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16 comments
corrective_unconscious
corrective_unconscious

I'd marry you, but only if I would get custody of that salmon jacket after the divorce.

Popstardj3
Popstardj3

i dont disagree with your point on your behalf however, id say the majority of gays do try and be in relationships, and saying that being gay is your reason for being single assuming that means gays dont do relationship i think is a incorrect point

Sonofspam
Sonofspam

i'm straight and i can relate

Melinda9
Melinda9

To the New York State Legislature - Last year on October 10 in Connecticut, gay marriage went in to effect and all same-sex civil unions became marriages. So far, no lightening bolts, no depravity, no breakdown of society. In case you all were wondering.

Southern Dave
Southern Dave

Puh-leeze! Your life is neither "sad" nor "little."

And as the "Mr. Right Nows" fade in memory and the hangers-on fall off, if you WANTMr. Right -- not everyone does, and there's nothing wrong with that -- he'll be there.

I know, I know. Just call me Pollyanna The Glad Girl.

Oh, and since you quote it all the time, I bought Slim Keith's book. Just getting into it.

nostradavid
nostradavid

I thought not having to get married was one of the benefits of being gay.

Gogreengoddess
Gogreengoddess

Either way, your happiness should not dependent on whether or not you are married.  If you are a happy single you might have a greater chance of attracting another happy single...I didn't know I wanted to get married until I met the person I married....you never know...if you change your perspective you might attract the same....

MSpeer
MSpeer

I really dislike mimicking straights in any way. And although I am in a relationship I always enjoyed the fact that there were no legal ties to bind us.

However, when it comes to health-care proxies, estate taxes, federal tax benefits, etc. I have come to see the good of having the same rights as our hetero pals.

So I hope the law passes. Michael, I certainly see your side of things having been single most of my life as well. I know that you will ultimately come to grips with these new changes in our gay lives.

I have no patience for children but I admit their necessity and must now adjust to their screaming presence on gay beaches and in other formerly exclusively (and blissfully) childless environs. And don't get me started on weddings!

Movielover
Movielover

I'd love to marry my boyfriend, but I don't know who he is!

tony adams
tony adams

Michael, I'd love to marry you but I just washed my hair.

Savannah Montgomery
Savannah Montgomery

I hear you Michael, I too, get the "I can't BELIEVE you don't have a boyfriend!" from folks who know my history as well as hit-on line...I do the "been there, done that" to save breath and move on...sometimes, literally. 

Kfm817
Kfm817

George and I could use a blender.  Will you come to our wedding?

Wisel
Wisel

I agree! I don't need all my gay friends saying "I'm getting married! How about you?" in those patronizing tones.

Viv
Viv

That is hilarious and sad at the same time.

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