The Biggest Sexual Message Of The Year

Categories: Advice

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And this one came thanks to deposed coach Jerry Sandusky:

Don't shower with kids!

Don't "horse around"!

Don't hug them!

Don't touch their legs "with no intent of sexual contact"!

Don't touch their legs at all!

Don't get involved at all in any kind of disrobing, touching, or sharing private experiences.

Don't do anything unprofessional, inappropriate, or totally wack.

If you blatantly do stuff like that, people are going to think you're a child molester.

Especially if you are!

So quit with all the "horseplay" -- and don't even think of starting it with a toast of Jesus Juice.

And by the way, are you sure that was their leg?

Oy. Stop!!!


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12 comments
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Melinda9
Melinda9

The sight of him makes me feel sick.

Movielover
Movielover

I know you mean Jerry, not the fab fellow I described (right above your comment)! 

Melinda9
Melinda9

I'm sure you know I wasn't referring to the fabulous one of the white skin and wavy black hair.

JW
JW

Don't teach kids how to apply soap to their bodies.

Hiya
Hiya

The fab fellow sounds, well, fab!!

Movielover
Movielover

Oh, yeah.  I know I'll ponder his virtues at some time or another....

Ick
Ick

Well, how old was he?

Movielover
Movielover

30-ish.  White skin and wavy black hair.  Cleft in his chin.  Smelled good.

Movielover
Movielover

Sad that Jerry didn't take to heart Blanche's lament in Street Car after she kissed the paperboy: "I have to keep my hands off of children."  On a more age-appropriate note - this morning in a crowded subway car, a beautiful looking young guy was really close, face-to-face and I think my computer carrying case was on his dick.  After a stop in another station and everybody shifted around a little his back was to me and my hand was on his round firm ass.  I could feel his butt crack through his clothes (glad I wasn't wearing gloves!) and though I wouldn't molest a stranger (without encouragement), was this ok?  It was a lovely way to start MY morning.

Musto
Musto

Let me add that Sandusky maintains his innocence.

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