Two Christmas Songs I Really Hate!

Categories: Music

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I know "hate" and "Christmas" probably shouldn't be in the same sentence, so how about "despise"?

Anyway, I absolutely loathe "The Little Drummer Boy".

I find it slow and tedious and pretentious and annoying.

Hearing it over and over again is the equivalent of putting hot pokers under my nails.

The only version I can tolerate is the duet between Bing Crosby and David Bowie, and that's only because it's so unbelievably bizarre that the weirdness makes it rather compelling.

The other Christmas ditty I want to go away for all time is "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas."

It's a brilliant tune, mind you, and Judy Garland sang the shit out of it, but it's just so sad and poignant and depressing that instead of lifting a glass of eggnog by the end of it, you want to put shards of glass to your veins.

Every time that song comes on somewhere, I no longer believe in Santa Claus -- or in the value of life itself.

Make it stop!

A Christmas song I can take??

"All I Want for Christmas Is You," sung by Mariah Carey at her best.

Sure, it's a bittersweet message, but the song is upbeat and fun!

And as long as we're stuck with this freakin' holiday every year, let's make it FUN!!!


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24 comments
Yi-Peng Li
Yi-Peng Li

I know you'll hate me for this because I would very much like to mention Santa Claus is coming to town. Although this Coots & Gillespie song is catchy and jaunty and brings out the child in us, I've not felt happy with the lyrics. They assume everybody's been naughty and not nice, and  it jars with the spirit of goodwill that Christmas is meant to promote.

I alto take issue with the jazzed-up renditions of the traditional carols, such as the modern reworkings of Silent Night or Hark! the herald-angels sing. Why can't the Christmas hymns and carols be treated with due respect, dignity and decorum? It's a good thing they haven't assaulted Once in royal David's city, that carol that starts the King's Christmas Lessons & Carols service. 

Susan Erenberg
Susan Erenberg

As you didn't list it among the tunes you hate, I must presume you are not familiar with "Christmas Shoes".  It may make everything else look lovely in comparison.

Melinda9
Melinda9

Oh, God - I heard that for the first time a few weeks ago when I was trapped in a waiting room with a country radio station.

Harlowrose
Harlowrose

Mariah Carey annoys me. I only prefer the very old songs. I love Judy Garland. There's no contest to her, except maybe Bing Crosby and Nat King Cole. 

Movielover
Movielover

Madonna's Santa Baby stank compared to Eartha Kitt's.  Hate that drummer boy song too!

Melinda9
Melinda9

Happy holidays! - hope you found a pale someone with dark wavy hair under the tree.

Monsieurpatric
Monsieurpatric

Amusing though is the use of "Little Drummer Boy" with regard to Texas Governor Rick Perry.

Abel
Abel

I just remembered the Christmas song I truly NEVER want to hear again:  Bob Carlisle's "Christmas Shoes" - about the little boy trying to buy his dying mother a new pair of shoes for "when momma meets Jesus tonight."  

F. Packer
F. Packer

That Pretenders Christmas song is THE FUCKING BEST!!

Ralph
Ralph

A local FM station here in Houston plays Xmas music from Thanksgiving onward, nonstop. You can control it in your vehicle but you can’t do much when you hear the same station in all the grocery stores, Walgreens, CVS, even JCPenny, Macy’s, Dillards. You hear the bad stuff repeated so often that you feel like going on a killing spree, especially when I hear Mariah’s "All I Want," because, baby, you’re certainly not what I want for Xmas. But wouldn’t mind a little more of Josh Groban, who has refurbished some of the "classics" with a melodious, masculine sound that can really lift you. Unlike that Clay Aiken, who makes just about everyone cringe when he lisps "It Came Upon a Midnight Clear." Think I might want to include him in that spree.

Abel
Abel

The original lyrics for "Have Yourself" were much bleaker:

Have yourself a merry little Christmas, it may be your last,Next year we may all be living in the pastHave yourself a merry little Christmas, pop that champagne cork,Next year we will all be living in New York.No good times like the olden days, happy golden days of yore,Faithful friends who were dear to us, will be near to us no more.But at least we all will be together, if the Fates allow,From now on we'll have to muddle through somehow.So have yourself a merry little Christmas now. 

Garland refused to sing it as written, and the lyrics were changed, mercifully.  Personal associations and Garland's singing of it keep the song high on my list of Christmas favorites.

Rogie
Rogie

Sorry to dissent, but the original sounds a whole lot better - tough, sardonic, and edgy. Hope a new recording of it comes out soon!

Abel
Abel

It fits the story of the movie, certainly, but would hardly have become the Christmas classic that it has with the first set of lyrics.  Garland didn't feel she could possibly sing those lyrics to little Margaret O'Brien.  As far as I know, the original lyrics have never been recorded.  You can read about this on Wikipedia, if you're interested.  Thanks!

Shitcircle
Shitcircle

Pa rum pum pum pum.  That video is super weird. lol.

Pat Bradley
Pat Bradley

I like Lady Bunny's version ever better. Have you seen it Michael?

mjm
mjm

a thousand gays disagree with you on the 1st one, Musto

Savannah Montgomery
Savannah Montgomery

"Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer"...local radio DJ's thinks it's hi-larry-us to play incessantly. I can't change the channel at the folk's place.

Muscato
Muscato

"Little Drummer Boy" - even when sung by Grace Jones? That was one of the great moments in television, up there with Bowie and Der Bingle....

Midge
Midge

I'm so glad someone finally said that about "Have Yourself..." I find it unbearable. I'm not thrilled about "Chestnuts Roasting..." either.

Ouzo
Ouzo

I agree!! Bring on the fun Xmas tunes and let's drop the sad, boring ones.

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