Help Me Create The Fashion Victim Museum!

By Michael Musto Thu., Mar. 29 2012 at 10:30 AM

Categories: Fashion

Who could be more qualified to curate this thing than me?

And I'm quite certain you can help!

Here are the exhibits and displays I've already got in mind:

*Asymmetrical outfits, calculatedly damaged jeans, body paint, sideways visors, and sunglasses

All represented in the above photo -- a miracle of victimization!

*Shoulder pads

Any kind of shoulder pads. They scream "victim!" and usually look like unhealthy growths that need to be looked at by a medical professional.

*Expensive designer handbags

Don't people know the cheap knockoffs look exactly the same? Dummos!

*The collar up

This invariably makes me spew. It's so silly looking, like the wearer just came out of a pretentious, dated gay wind tunnel.

*Polka dots

They've always looked horrible on anyone except Jeff Chandler. Even horizontal stripes are more flattering.

*Nose rings

They make me want to pull really hard.

*A tattoo of your own name

What, you couldn't remember it?

And finally ...

*Cosby-style sweaters

I have a million of them!

In fact, the museum is located right in my walk-in closet.

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nostradavid

The Joan Collins outfit is still awesome. She's not a victim - she's a perpetrator.Did you ever wear your polo shirts inside-out (collar up optional) to show off the designer label ?

Allen Firth

Well, it's like taking the costumes and hairstyles of "Beyond the Valley of the Dolls" and saying, "Yes, that's what America was wearing in 1969." Or thinking the costumes and colors of "Laugh-In" were a genuine reflection of what the Beautiful People wore to parties.

But, just as most hair-dos have a shelf life of two years (after that, it turns into a cliché seen on TV sitcoms and wrestling matches), and rock stars rarely change the hair style and clothing they wore when they first became famous, so much of it is outdated as soon as it hits the streets.

Personally I would ban (or burn) all of Lady Gaga's outfits, since they served no purpose other than to outrage and be photographed; and...Anything Madonna has worn since turning 50. You're grandmother age, dear; it's time to start dressing Age Appropriate. Even your daughter cringes at what you wear these days.

Nonplussed

Plucked and styled eyebrows on men.Those hideous ballet slipper type shoes and the way women walk in them.Anything Versace or Ed Hardy; they are flipsides of the same coin.

Ofu

LaToya should be the curator.

latenitebump

shoulder pads is what got lady gaga noticed in the press.

latoya jackson headbands should make a comeback.and chrissie ponytails from 3´s company.

Ofu

Helena Bonham Carter!

Denise LeBeau

Love it! Oh, oh, what about an exhibit just featuring pants/sweats with words across your ass (cause people don't always know to look real hard there). And Dior has a bag that will fit great into your first show: a plastic neon pink and orange hobo bag w/a blinding tribal pattern costing over $6,000. Confused that plastic could cost so much? It's not plastic it's rubberized python skin. (what will make you barf first: the hideous design or the rampant glamorized greedy cruelty?)