Name Your Most Obscure Celebrity Connection

Categories: Advice

220px-Lea_Michele_by_David_Shankbone.jpg
David Shankbone/Wikipedia

People who try to impress you at parties always tend to fall back on the same sad name droppings:

"Merv Griffin once came into my shop -- when he was alive, of course. He walked right back out, but I could have sworn he looked at me first."

"My cousin is friends with someone whose hairdresser once baby-sat Lea Michele."

Or my particular favorite (because I've uttered it myself):

"I went to school with Kim Stanley's daughter and we were even in a play together, though nowadays she won't answer my Facebook requests!"

Every time you hear something of that ilk, you want to make a pukey face, then reach down to the floor to pick up the dropped name and try to undo the mess.

But it's time to fess up, folks. We don't just hear this stuff, we say it.

We all have these celeb-dropping stories that we dine on whenever we feel insecure and need validation.

So tell me yours.

The lower, more pathetic, and vaguer, the better -- even if it involves a reality star.

And thank you to datalounge.com for the idea.


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Piper
Piper

I was on 80th and 5th in January and I walked past Drew Barrymore and her boyfriend.  It was a very, very cold sunny afternoon.  I had on ray bans, a black hat, scarf, gloves.  I guess I looked like a celebrity trying to disguse himself because Drew was staring at me with a look on her face...as if she was trying to figure out who I was.  It was odd.

Faghag
Faghag

I was in line in NY for the play 'Closer'  starring Natasha Richardson with a friend of mine. There was a woman with short salt 'n' pepper hair standing in front of us, and when she turned around, lo and behold, was Emma Thompson. She stated yakking it up with us, as if we were old friends. Hysterically funny, warm, and down-to-earth. This is a nice story though, not pathetic. I also taught in a school where one of my student's mom worked at Carrier Clinic, were Connie Francis was a patient. She said she was way out, but also very kind, and constantly tried to give her money because she was a single mom. Another nice story, so maybe I'm getting off track here. My earlier story was pathetic.

Faghag
Faghag

meant to say 'where'.

Jack M
Jack M

I knew someone whose father was friends with Kurt Vonnegut.  She said if the phone rang in the middle of the night, either someone was dead or it was Vonnegut.

latenitebump
latenitebump

i met mrs. david bowie--supermodel IMAN--outside parsons school of art and design (7th ave) for an oscar de le renta show on my way somewhere. i should still have the napkin or tissue she signed with a kiss (lipstick kiss) when i asked for her autograph. she standing with another supermodel, too.very nice woman. gracious. she started screaming oscar! oscar!i was inside the erotic bakery (christopher str.) the same time as glenn hughes the leatherman of the original village people.i met the drummer of culture club in london jon moss. we were going into a club at the same time.i was friends with the cousin of the legendary octavia st. laurnet (paris is burning).i was a friend of the boyfriend dc larue.i went out the brother of alicia myers.is lady bunny a celebrity?my boss went out on a date with bette midler (rolling stones concert). said she was a bitch.

Troofire
Troofire

I was in the same movement class as Geena Davis at Boston U.  I remember massaging her in class once or twice.  I sat next to JFK, Jr. on the Boston shuttle in 1980 -- he was taking a semester off to work on Teddy's campaign -- I got to see his love trail when he hoisted his jacket into the overhead.  I directed Bruce WIllis in his first play in NY.  We hired him because he could play the harmonica.  Dyan Cannon nearly assaulted me back in the 60's when I was given the seat she claimed she'd been promised on the aisle at a Broadway comedy.  I sat behind Alec Guiness at a performance of Othello, starring James Earl Jones in Central Park in 1964 (the first and probably only time that the real Obi Wan and Darth Vader crossed paths.  Guiness left at intermission.

Monsieurpatric
Monsieurpatric

Jean Cocteau helping Jean Marai with his knotted tie in the W.C. of La Coupile, circa 1965.

Monsieurpatric
Monsieurpatric

Merde mes chers!  - c'est La Coupole a Montparnasse.

Monsieurpatric
Monsieurpatric

Helas!  Et c'est Jean Marais.

Monsieurpatric
Monsieurpatric

I'm suffering vapors today it's clear for the Cocteau/Marais sighting was '62 a year prior to Monsieur Cocteau's passing.

Timmee
Timmee

Parker Posey nearly ran me over on her bike on Lafayette Street.

mjm
mjm

I almost got LeBron James's autograph. My parents and relatives have met quite a few celebs.

mjm
mjm

 -dad met June Allyson in an elevator. very sweet lady-mom has shaken hands w/ (then future) Presidents Reagan and H.W. Bush. Ronnie also spoke at my grandmother's college graduation and she shook his and Nancy's hands. -one of my cousins got a backstage pass for one of the American Idol tour in '08 and met Jordin Sparks

Savannah Montgomery
Savannah Montgomery

1.) At a B'way show, I saw Jackie O.--standing in a long line!-- for the ladies room at intermission...like regular folk. She wasn't "hiding", just sort of looking at the floor and Playbill.

Everyone did triple-takes, but left her alone.

2.) My community theater director went to William & Mary same time as Glen Close and he directed her in some student productions...when she was "up and coming" on B'way ("Barnum")....he'd come up to see "Glennie"...I was to meet them for drinks, but she'd left before I got there.

Supergr8
Supergr8

I had a friend named Jesse in the early 80's.  She was lovers with Lilly Tomlin in the 60's.  She had a few snapshots she showed me of her and Lilly.  I haven't told that one in years and years.

Ynnocence
Ynnocence

Living in NYC you're bound to see a celeb on the streets nearly everyday if you know how to spot them. Well I didn't, but whenever I was with friends they'd always somehow announce the presence of someone famous, and only then would I recognize the person.

But around that time (in the '90s) Lili Taylor was God as far as I was concerned. I recognized her instantly, followed her a few blocks, then treated myself to a burger afterward. And that's as far as my stalking career went, before or since.

Ynnocence
Ynnocence

Uh-oh, you were talking about another Lily. Guess I'm still dazzled by the memory of Miss Taylor.

faghag
faghag

I had sex with in 1981 with a guy (now my good friend) who was 18 and struggling with his sexuality. He later had a relationship with a lawyer named Larry, who had a brief, but torrid relationship with Alec Baldwin. So, I'm 4 degrees of Alec Baldwin. On a stranger note, I once woke up in the balcony lounge of Studio 54, and sitting next to me was J.J. Jackson, an original MTV VJ. I wasn't drunk, I worked the night shift and just was tired from dancing. I don't know which is more pathetic.

Guargum
Guargum

Alec Baldwin is gay, bi, whatever?

faghag
faghag

 Back in the early days, Alec was a bartender at 54. Swung both ways, they says. Ain't one to gossip........

Sexy Yenta
Sexy Yenta

My brother and I were in still high school in this story, so I like to think it speaks more about kids with chutzpah than it does about stalker darkness...  We saw Jerry Seinfeld, his then girlfriend Shoshanna Lonstein, and several members of the extended Lonstein clan enter a "cozy" but expensive "eaterie" for lunch, so we entered behind them and seated ourselves at an adjoining table.  Where we proceeded to stretch water and a basket of bread as long as humanly possible...  Until today, I thought that Seinfeld posed for a photo with us that day because we weren't too much younger than his girlfriend, but having checked wikipedia, she was quite a bit older, so maybe we were just cute...   

Mah5480
Mah5480

I was hounded by paparazzi thinking I was Stephen Dorff

Mrs Nyback
Mrs Nyback

I went to a party with playwright Doric Wilson, who once was hired to escort Marlene Dietrich to a gala event. He was chosen for his youth, height and striking good looks. He said when they opened the limousine door, and he saw her (he had not been warned), he froze. She was wearing a flesh colored skintight gown with sewn on jewels. She said "They didn't tell you, did they?", and welcomed him into the car. They discussed how they were going to choreograph her exit from the limo, once they arrived at the event. She was in her sixties.

MSpeer
MSpeer

A dear friend of mine was allegedly the evening's trick for Tab Hunter back in the early sixties. He said he was very well endowed.

I met Connie Francis's hairdresser at a party ten years ago.

My sister briefly dated one of The Critters back in the 60s.

Lady Lucia
Lady Lucia

I stood in line for the bathroom behind Celeste Holm at a community theater in Brooklyn.

Jefferson
Jefferson

Anyone who has sex with me is within six degrees of sex with Elvis.

I had sex with a woman who had had sex with a former child star from Karen Valentine's Room 222. He had had sex with Ann-Margret. Now, you can steer from Ann-Margret to another number of sex partners; I choose the King.

Oysters
Oysters

I know someone who did hair for Bette Midler, but I think it was only once, when Bette was doing a morning show. And he probably didn't do much to her hair since I think it was already done.

Outre
Outre

I once saw Kaye Ballard in a diner. End of story.

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