General Aladeen Is Having A Press Conference
And I can't tell you where or when.
But I'll be there, seeing as my presence was "cordially demanded" by Admiral General Aladeen, the Undemocratically Elected Leader and Beloved Oppressor of Wadiya, at a press conference to highlight the plight of dictatorships worldwide.
The invite also gave us some background info on the General:
"When Aladeen was just a child, his father Omar died in a tragic hunting accident when he was hit by 97 stray bullets and a stray grenade. Shortly afterwards, Omar's Chief Advisor suggested that Aladeen should be officially declared the successor. The supremely-humble Aladeen responded by accepting the position.
He then shot Chief Advisor for challenging the rule of his father. After several failed assassination attempts by the imbecilic dogs of the CIA (a poisoned milkshake, an exploding camel, etc.) and a hatred of tedious State functions, Aladeen was forced to employ a team of body doubles."
There's a whole lot more, but you get the idea.
And I'm sure you realize by now (thanks to the above photo, for one thing) that Aladeen is Sacha Baron Cohen's character in the imminent comedy The Dictator.
He's basically Bruno with some weapons.
Anyway, I just rsvp'd for the conference and the recording said, "You've reached the Republic of Wadiya press office. Please leave a message."
That Cohen guy really knows how to cary out his shtick in grand scale.