Michael Fassbender's Penis Cost Him An Oscar Nomination

Categories: Celebs

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That's the contention of this GQ profile of the actor, who was getting lots of Oscar buzz for Shame until constant focus on his privates took away from the film's golden glow.


The author notes "the surreal, feverish totemization of penis size in our culture: People feel free to harp on about someone's penis as though this is not insulting or inappropriate because, if that penis is sufficiently large, any reference to it is, by default, flattering. (Were he possessed of 'an unimpressive sausage,' so to speak, far less would have been said.)

"This is why each time Fassbender's role in Shame is reduced to a simple act of undressing, no one seems to worry that it's an insult to everything else he did in the movie: He has a big dick, so he's got nothing to be unhappy about and every reason to smile at anything we might say on the subject. I think it really may be that idiotic."


Fassbender himself admits that he was sure his penis--I mean his being--was headed towards the Oscar ceremony.

"At the beginning, people [say], 'You're going to be going to the Oscars,' and you're like, 'Whatever, doesn't matter, don't think so.' But after a while it does penetrate. After a while you're like, 'Anyway, so I'm going to the Oscars...' " He laughs.

"And you start to believe it. And I did. I thought I was going. And then I found out I wasn't and I was very upset by it. The first reaction was 'What the fuck...?'

"It's a vanity thing. It does become important to you. And it shouldn't."


I agree that the Oscars are squeamish about such things--plus the film is dark and doesn't give you an easy resolution.

The character doesn't change, and he comes off pretty passive through most of it.

They generally prefer stuff that's volatile and uplifting--and clothed.


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26 comments
Jgvalez52
Jgvalez52

I thnk in this css the Oscar commitie did the right thing. A penis, a movie does not make. And Musto's playfulness with secure parts are only del-serving to his off stage persona.

Wings
Wings

Halle Berry shows her stuff and gets an Oscar (Old male voters get aroused). Fassbender shows his stuff and gets nothing. (Old male voters get jealous).

Melinda9
Melinda9

Celebrity Problem #42 - When Your Penis Becomes More Famous Than You Are

E Dkim
E Dkim

I think he is aroused by the women--ARGH!

Melinda9
Melinda9

I liked Carey Mulligan's rendition of New York New York.

James Buchanan
James Buchanan

O, Gawd, why didn't I invite him to the White House

VonD
VonD

You sure it was that nice long schlong and not that moralistic, puritanical film he was in? I hated hated hated it!

Melinda9
Melinda9

So unfair that his stupid penis cost him the Oscar.

anonTWO
anonTWO

 whaddaya mean "fetishization"? the penis IS a sexual organ/object worthy of objectification.conversely, breasts are NOT sexual organs and are constantly scrutinized in every possible anD  impossible way. For example, mothers who breastfeed in public are looked upon as child molesters or something!so this film of his features an oversized dick, (YAY) threesomes, gay sex etc. ..why and how did I miss seeing this one in theater?

Monsieurpatric
Monsieurpatric

And our impression was that it was his scrotum...

Roids
Roids

Who needs an Oscar when you've got a dick like that?

J S
J S

One only needs to take a closer look at the actual Oscar statuette to know why Fassbender wasn't nominated.  The Oscar has no penis (think of a Ken Doll, only cast in gold).  This was strictly a case of Penis Envy.

E Dkim
E Dkim

Let's not ignore the fact that this breakthrough film has become Fassbender's ticket into the upper stratosphere of Hollywood studdom. This is one lucky dude. And Oscar could have nominated him for Jane Eyre or A Dangerous Method. But I guess all of this is beside the point.

E Dkim
E Dkim

Plus he does come off as a bit smug about it, I mean the massive swinging dick is almost smacking the audience in the face. He's wanking a lot, he's having brazen interracial sex, internet sex, drug use, threesomes, gay orgies, there's a suicide attempt. He actually believed he was going to the Oscars? I'm sure there's a porn star or two out there who give just as revelatory and poignant performances but they sure as heck ain't being nominated for an Oscar. Gimme a break.

Savannah Montgomery
Savannah Montgomery

..yet va-jay-jays gets a pass..."ennobling"... 'daring"...."monologues".

buddy
buddy

I don't like the vein of this convo. Not sure where it's headed. These kind of issues can get a little hairy. Balls.

Ulu
Ulu

I know! "After a while it does penetrate." Hilarious!

Southern Dave
Southern Dave

"But after a while it does penetrate," Fassbender says.

He's furthering more dick talk right there!

Methinks the penis doth protest too much.

VonD
VonD

That was kinda cute for about a hot minute, then I just got tired of her and the whole damned film! 

Why couldn't he be a happy sex addict, by which I mean, a fun pro-sexer?

They do exist, and that would have been a film nobody could have passed up, no matter what the Oscar mafia did or didn't do.

RaraAvis
RaraAvis

He was already on Abe Lincoln's list, T!

VonD
VonD

The penis wasn't stupid, the Oscar penophobes were!

Urd
Urd

I know. And "totemization." The penis IS a totem.

VonD
VonD

They're a dime a dozen in Germany and twice as long and nice and brown in Dominican Republic and Cuba!

Melinda9
Melinda9

I stand corrected. But would you agree that it was extremely thoughtless on his penis' part?

VonD
VonD

Oh that penis had a mind of its own at several points, chile.

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