Baby Jane Remake In The Works: Let The Casting Begin

Categories: Film

baby jane 2.jpg
The 1962 Granny Guignol classic Whatever Happened To Baby Jane? is being remade by Walter Hill, and it's time to line up two stars who are over the hill to play the parts.

You know the drill.

Jane is a nutjob who's stuck in her cutesy-pie kiddie routine and is so adorable except that she viciously holds her sister captive and tries to serve her dead animals all day.

And Blanche is disabled and helpless, completely victimized by the demented Jane, though flashbacks prove it's she who's the real c word by a long shot and deserving of every last rat entree.

The resulting flick is scary and demented and degrading and pathetic and I've watched it 117 times.

So here are my casting choices for the remake.

Any of these pairings would equal huge smash, and not just in HK:


Madonna and Lady Gaga

Betty White and Doris Roberts

Julia Roberts and Charlize Theron

The Olsen twins

The Fanning sisters

Maggie Smith and Shirley MacLaine

Barbra Streisand and Liza Minnelli

Grace Slick and Tina Turner

Tyler Perry and Diahann Carroll

Tom Cruise and John Travolta


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14 comments
Louella
Louella

Donald Trump and Rosie O'Donnell

VonD
VonD

No, no, no! To start off with, Blanche would have a cell phone! She'd have access to a computer and could easily send out an SOS! Hell, a Tweet or Facebook post would have the cops Tasing Baby Jane before you could say "But you are, Blanche, you are." I also don't want to see the maid, black or latina or blatina etc., killed. There's been enough of that in Hollywrong movies for 100 years. Enough! The whole premise doesn't work for 2012! Come up with something new, Hollywrong, please, and stop all these stupid remakes! We know you're mentally bankrupt but the rest of us aren't!

Afagagag
Afagagag

Maggie Smith and Shirley MacLaine !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stompers
Stompers

They do NOT have any talent, but they Are haggy enough.

pozzguy
pozzguy

Ellen Burstyn and Shirley Knight (after a little dieting)/or Piper Laurie

Michael Khalsa
Michael Khalsa

Hillary & Hailey Duff for me Michael. I don't know whether they have any talent. Actually I stand corrected I don't know whether Hillary has any talent but it would be fun to watch.

The Ghost of Lynn Redgrave
The Ghost of Lynn Redgrave

Tyler Perry could play Elvira as Madea.  But who could do Edwin Flagg?  And his harridan of a mother?  And who could possibly equal the thespian gifts of B.D. Merrill as the zombie-like teenager next door (with chirpy Anna Lee as her suspiciously British mother?)

nostradavid
nostradavid

Replace Walter Hill with John Waters at the helm.  Mink Stole and Mary Vivian Pearce  - or -  Patty Hearst and Traci Lords  Baltimore would be the perfect location.     add to that:  Michael Musto & Harvey Fierstein  for the best actors/screenplay combo.  The show would write itself!

BetteD
BetteD

What a STEW-pid idea!  What a WASTE-a time! WHAT a DUM-pah!

Antonin
Antonin

Kathleen Turner (Jane) and Michelle Pfieffer (Blanche)

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