Chuck Norris' Personal Code Of Honor! How Many Of These 10 Rules Does He Pay Attention To?

But there's a method to his madness.

Here is the former film star's conduct code--from his martial art Chun Kuk Do--which is so inspiring I might have to start breaking planks of wood with my hands.

1. I will develop myself to the maximum of my potential in all ways.

And this process will start when exactly?

2. I will forget the mistakes of the past and press on to greater achievements.

OK, great. Let's forget your Boy Scouts remarks.

3. I will continually work at developing love, happiness, and loyalty in my family.

Terrific. After all, your daughter is the result of an extramarital affair.

4. I will look for the good in all people and make them feel worthwhile.

Even gays? I mean, we're included in "all people," no?

5. If I have nothing good to say about a person, I will say nothing.

Even gays??? I mean, a gay sort of counts as "a person," right?

6. I will always be enthusiastic about the success of others as I am about my own.

Then say something nice about Wanda Sykes!

7. I will maintain an attitude of open-mindedness.

Puhleease, Missy. Now you're really stretching my spandex!

8. I will maintain respect for those in authority and demonstrate this respect at all times.

Then why don't you demonstrate respect for our President by saying, "I'm in favor of same-sex marriage too"?

9. I will always remain loyal to my God, my country, my family, and my friends.

Make sure, OK? Because there was that extramarital thing.

10. I will remain highly goal-oriented throughout my life because that positive attitude helps my family, my country, and myself.

To which I say: Your attitude isn't positive any more than it's helping our country!

But best of luck to you, Chuck. Don't hurt me.