Scat Queens! Get Thee To The Central Park Zoo!

Categories: Advice

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I was having a perfectly innocent time at the Central Park Zoo the other day, marveling at all the sunbathing turtles, shy red pandas, unselfconscious scarlet ibises, and precious little cotton top tamarins.

And I came upon a snow leopard--imperious, regal, and willingly posing for tourists' photos, as if fully aware of his own worth.

And right past its window display came the sign that turned my head around:


"SNOW LEOPARD SCAT!

An analysis of snow leopard droppings tells one what the cat has eaten lately.

Most likely marmot fur."

The sign is attached to what resembles a giant magnifying glass that juts out, and it's positioned to focus on a rock with some faux snow leopard crap on it, for all the families to gather around and examine.


Which led me to wonder:

*Is it faux?

*Is the term "scat" really used in public venues like this, not just in Hell's Kitchen?

*Does the snow leopard like the works of Ella Fitzgerald?

*Where could I find the bald marmots?


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4 comments
FredsterNYC©
FredsterNYC©

Isn't a Snow Leopard Scat a queen who does one too many bumps and then wants to eat her shit?

Parvenu
Parvenu

Oh, my. The things you learn.

Roi
Roi

Sounds like the spirit of the old Mine Shaft has transplanted itself to the zoo. Charming.

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