The New Miss Fire Island Has Been Crowned!

Categories: Drag Queens

The stunning Yuhua Hamasaki (above) won the coveted Miss Fire Island prize at the Ice Palace the other day, even though her first name sounds like an accusation.

Sultry Monica Storm copped Ms. Fire Island (for older, larger gals), Dallas DuBois was named Miss Cherry Grove, and Holly Dae won Entertainer of the Year for bravely continuing her African-styled number to the end, long after the music was accidentally unplugged.

(I say "accidentally" because none of the other contestants were seen in the vicinity when the incident happened.)

The six-hour drag event was delightfully hosted by Ariel Sinclair, Porsche, and Logan Hardcore, who remembered the thrill of winning the previous year. ("I cursed, I did dope, and I drank heavily, and I still won!" said Logan. "I didn't serve a package. I served myself!")

So did one of the contestants, Dixie Normous, who was very funny lipsynching to an X-rated Wendy Ho parody.

Afterwards, he told me he used to be a firefighter, but suffered post traumatic stress when a baby died after a fire.

("I held a child in my arms and couldn't bring it back to life!" said Dixie, breaking down crying as I felt a little bit helpless.)

After years of near-suicidal depression, the ex-fireman replaced his hose with some Supp-Hose and now feels, "Drag has given me a new lease on life."

I feel the same way about just watching it!

But catching two of the non-winners stomping around in a rage afterwards was not that glamorous, I'll admit.

In fact, I was terrified!

Hey, maybe they did unplug the music.

Photos by Colin Shanley

You can't win unless your hair looks good from the back too!

Yuhua and China. Jewels, lashes, and tats--but only one tiara between them.

Lady Priscilla, queen of the potlach

Yes, Helena Bonham Carter was a contestant, lol.

Some of our patterns almost matched.

Me and Dixie Normous. She wouldn't lie!

If they only had a Congeniality prize.

He should be MR. Fire Island. How do I vote?

The Ice Palace has the rare security staff that doesn't consist of power-crazed weirdos. These guys are actually nice!

So was this kid, who helped out. He looked straight out of a 1990s Calvin Klein commercial.

The event's hosts Ariel Sinclair, Logan Hardcore. Porsche

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