Pretty Songs That I Hate Myself For Loving

By Michael Musto Tue., Oct. 9 2012 at 11:00 AM

Normally, I don't appreciate anything too musically pretty.

Even if it's a formula love ballad, I like a little bittersweet quality sprinkled in there--or preferably something just plain bitter.

But there are some lovely standards that I can't help adoring because it's just so much easier to surrender to their melodic charms than to be a hideous, slimy grinch and fight back.

They are:

*"You Light Up My Life" sung by Debby Boone.

This song is lilting, it's seductive, it slays me every time. I know it's crap (despite having won an Oscar) but it's really good crap. And no, unlike Boone, I don't think of God when I sing it. I think of my electrician.

*"You Are So Beautiful" by Joe Cocker.

So tooth-achingly sweet, but the rawness of his voice and the surprise of his spasms lend it an edge. Give in. Turn pain into acceptance. The song..is...so...beautiful...beautiful...to me.

*"Beautiful", sung by Christina Aguilera.

So nice, so pretty, so uplifting---all the things I hate. But it's a great message about the need to look behind the skin and embrace humanity. What the fuck, just shut up and like it.

*"Hero", sung by Mariah Carey.

A total Hallmark experience about finding the hero deep down inside, blah blah blah, but it's got a lilt and builds to some knockout notes. And as with the Aguilera song, anything that champions the underdog deserves a little respect. Impressively, I can sing this exactly like Mariah--but only in the shower.

*"Someone Like You"--Adele

I normally can't stand this level of nobility--again, give me bitter or give me death--but the song's haunting realness fills its prettiness with lots of soul. A landmark achievement in power balladeering.

*"She's Like The Wind" by Patrick Swayze, featuring Wendy Fraser

I actually make no apologies whatsoever for loving this one. It reeks of a dewy-eyed sincerity that expunges any potential ickiness. Swayze sang it beautifully and I love the counterpoint with Fraser towards the end, making it all go by like a nice breeze. (And at least she didn't pass wind.)

Or maybe it's just me. Are you vomiting?

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13MitredAbbots

https://www.dropbox.com/s/npn6dml3xftek19/Christina%20Beautiful%2013%20Mitred%20Abbots%2076bpm_3.mp3

This is a remix I did of Christina's "Beautiful." It's a free download.

Stevart topcommenter

"I remember all my lifeRaining down as cold as iceA shadow of a manA face through a windowCrying in the nightThe night goes intoMorning, just another dayHappy people pass my wayLooking in their eyesI see a memoryI never realizedHow happy you made me, oh MandyWell you came and you gave without takingAnd I sent you away, oh MandyAnd you kissed me and stopped me from shakingAnd I need you today, oh Mandy."

I invented the wave while listening to this song but I didn't have the money to patent it and so it was sold to Hollywood bigshots who would have me killed if I ever THOUGHT about suing them. So it goes.

latenitebump

you forgot: torn between two lovers. mary mcgregor.

roberta flack. killing me softly.

charlene i´ve never been to me.

olivia newton john i honestly love you

the light up my life songwriter. another perv. arrested recently. stay away from that number.

bethesda

1 Like

No one could hit a high note like Minnie, even Mariah.

nostradavid topcommenter

@bethesda True - and I don't hate myself for loving her. I had a front row table to see her and George Benson together in KC. She did a set, then he did a set, then she returned and they did a set together. What a show!

nostradavid topcommenter

1 Like

I have to add "Lovin' You" by Minnie Riperton, from the Perfect Angel album in 1974. The melody was a lullaby she sang to her daughter Maya Rudolph. It was arranged, co-produced and accompanied by Stevie Wonder. Her five-octave vocal range shimmers.