Everything You Need To Know About Anal Bleaching! NSFW

Categories: Advice

A few years ago, I escorted my then-boyfriend to a hair salon for a dye job and considered that anal bleaching.

After all, I was bleaching my asshole!

But it turns out the practice actually refers to one's nether regions.

It involves shining up one's back door. Sparkling up one's pucker palace. Spiffing up your highway exit ramp.

And the gays can't get enough of it.

"Maintaining a presentable butthole has long been a priority for gay men," states provocatively named author Manuel Hung in an informative Next magazine article. Apparently, the gays outdo dogs; they might not sniff each other's butts, but they do check them out for tonal quality.

Anal bleaching, continues Hung, "is typically done by applying a cream or gel that contains a lightening agent to the skin around the anus."

But the gays have found that it's not that easy. It takes several applications and the lightening is not permanent--so it's sort of like whitening your teeth!

What's more, risks could include discomfort, burning, scarring, or incontinence, and on dark skin, it can result in a "blotchy booty".

And yet most of the over-the-counter products are considered fairly safe and many find that it's totally, like, worth it. If all works out, your anus will be as light and bright as the tunnel in Poltergeist.

And by the way, you can thank the California-based adult industry for having popularized this stuff in the first place. Thanks, whores!

Whether or not you want to hop aboard the butt bleaching bandwagon, Hung concludes that "It doesn't matter how pretty you think your hole looks if you're not truly taking care of it.

"Remember that a healthy asshole is a happy asshole!"

Sarah Palin must be very healthy indeed.

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