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» La Daily Musto «

by Michael Musto | email: musto@villagevoice.com

The Greatest Show on Earth? Charlton Heston's Privates!

Posted by Michael Musto at 3:00 PM, April 7, 2008

Don't you hate when, in a fit of housecleaning, you throw some shit out you haven't touched in years, then the next day it turns out you suddenly need it! This has happened to me with all manner of sarongs, tiaras, dildos, and the Best Actor trophy from my high school "Sing." And now with a naked photo of Charlton Heston! I had ripped it out of a book, amazed that the hunky actor had shown it all for an arty portrait in which the lithe, lean body that was hinted at in Ben Hur veritably throbbed in all its unclothed glory. And the dick! Honey, it made you want to scream, "Get Hur!" (Or maybe "Big Ben!") That thing could cause a whole lot of agony and ecstasy! Anyway, I foolishly threw the photo out and now I wish I had it so I could post it for you good people and prove that, though he was an often hamfisted actor and a gun advocate, Heston was an extremely hot piece of work. And with that thing between his legs, he didn't need a gun. May his piece rest in peace.

more: celebs

comments

I want to see that photo too!!!!
What was the name of the book, I'll go on Amazon.com. I need me some Ben Dover dick. I mean Ben Hur!

Posted by: Trixie Blowhard at April 7, 2008 3:08 PM

Damn, I can't remember. I was hoping you people would help. I think it was a big name photographer, maybe Avedon. But none of my online searches are coming up with anything. I know I didn't imagine this.

Posted by: musto at April 7, 2008 3:19 PM

Yummy, I heard both Gwen and Norma are having a blast at Charlton's "welcome" party. Love, Mitzi

Posted by: Gwen Verdon, Mitzi Gaynor, and Norma Desmond at April 7, 2008 3:59 PM

From one of the obits:
"....After a World War Two stint as a gunner in the Army Air Corps, Heston headed to Broadway, where he briefly supported himself with nude modelling between acting jobs...."

Posted by: Topper at April 7, 2008 4:19 PM

Thanks for that, Topper. I ddn't know that. But the shot I'm talking about was taken when Heston was already a big star. It was an arty nude portrait. I'd love to find those early ones too.

Posted by: musto at April 7, 2008 4:40 PM

He was practically nekked in Ben Hur and Planet of the apes. Wasn't that enough?

Posted by: sir bingaling at April 7, 2008 4:42 PM

He was stark naked in Planet. I seem to remember one has a brief glimpse of the said piece when the astronauts take a bath, briefly after entering ape territory.

Posted by: Zuleika at April 7, 2008 6:58 PM

Michael,

You are so funny again.

Posted by: frankie frank at April 8, 2008 12:30 AM

There have been a number of photos of Heston through the years wearing very little. There was a photo of him while making Julius Ceasar in Rome.
I hear on the first release the film had a fair amount of male nudity which was then cut I guess to be shown in classrooms. I wonder if these cut scenes still exist.
Anyway this was Heston from the front with a tiny roman g string looking like a god with a gorgeous extra next to him wearing just as little.

Posted by: capitol at April 10, 2008 9:56 AM

I bet your photo was from "Hollywood Life," only 5,000 copies printed, bound in velour. Published by Greybull Press. Photos by Eliot Eliofson of homes of the stars and often the stars who inhabited them. Foreward by the peerless Gavin Lambert. There is a two-page B&W photo of Heston in a sauna reading a script absolutely starkers and glorious, with a very small white cloth molded around his jumbo junk. A truly huge Heston hum-dinger. I remember at the time being astonished he would pose for such a pitchuh, but then, it's a very "AWTY" book. Come down for Southern Decadence for a look-see. Or when I get back to work I'll Xerox it for ya.

Southern Dave

Posted by: David Cuthbert at April 10, 2008 1:09 PM

that's exactly the shot, david! anything you could send me would be great.

Posted by: musto at April 10, 2008 2:33 PM

Here's the site for the publisher. They show the pic briefly


http://www.greybullpress.com/

hope it helps

Posted by: Keith at April 11, 2008 10:51 PM

thakns, keith, but I clicked on hollywood life on that site and didn't see the heston shot flash.

Posted by: patsy at April 11, 2008 11:14 PM

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