Is My Crassness Too Vulgar?
Posted by Michael Musto at 3:30 PM, May 9, 2008

photo by Tommy McCall
I was just looking through some of the blurbs from the villagevoice.com homepage describing my recent columns. (Yes, I actually write a column, folks. This blog is sort of a side venture—like trapping moths.) It occurred to me in a stroke of brilliant observation that so very many of the blurbs don't have much to do with neurosurgery or international politics. In fact, they generally are concerned with celebrity genitals and the filthy things they do with them. I was horrified as I glanced at the turdy blurbs, which literally hit below the belt as they aimed to lasso readers in the crassest, most dehumanizing way imaginable. Among the lowest ones:
"24 Star Won't Shave Her Privates"
"Valerie Bertinelli on Spitzer's Dick"
"Siegfried, Roy, and Glory Holes"
"Harvey Fierstein on the History of Blowjobs"
And of course (ah, the memories):
"Ass-Baring Parties Conquer Nightlife!"
I was all set to complain to the bigshots here about the LCD-ing of my work, until realizing (a) These blurbs perfectly capture the column. (b) They DO ensnare people to click. And (3) I wrote them myself! So bravo to me and my prolific pussy! Give me ideas for some other ones!








