Sorry, no favorite line. I just wanted ti be the first to post a comment!

"Why don't wash the platinum out of your hair and start acting like a lady." - Kirk Douglas in Ace in the Hole

"I don't go to church. Kneeling bags my nylons." -
Jan Sterling to Kirk Douglas in ACE IN THE HOLE!

"Ted Casablanca is not a fag--and I'm the dame that can prove it"--Patty Duke in Valley of the Dolls

"Dreadfully recherche. That's French, mother."--Mildred Pierce.

"Is that your boyfriend's spooge in your ear or are you just glad to semen"

from MASENGIL's GERBIL ROUNDUP circa 2009

also appeared in FACE IN MY CORNHOLE

"You will drink the black sperm of my vengence."

- Beyond the Valley of the Doors (written by Roger Ebert)

(Ooops - Beyond the Valley of the Dolls - but then you knew that.) Those Doll pics both have good ones.

maybe not the campiest evah....(mm may have trumped all) but didn't drew barrymore have a good line in the very recent grey gardens...."i'll be right down, just as soon as i out on some lipstick!"

"You know how bitchy fags can be."--Sharon Tate in (yep) Valley of the Dolls

new york city is wrapped up in being Labeija.
--Pepper Labeija
paris is burning

"C'mon, Oscar, you and me are goin' to get drunk!"
--Bette Davis in "The Star"

"My mother, a waitress! Weren't the pies bad enough?"
-- Ann Blyth, "Mildred Pierce"

"I'm not one of you anemic creatures who can get nourishment from a lettuce leaf! I'm an artist! I have zest and appetite. I want food and I'm going to have it!"
--Mary Astor, to Bette Davis in "The Great Lie."

"Eve would ask Abbott to give her Costello."
--Celeste Holm, in "All About Eve."

"You were a little shop girl from San Francisco. You should have stayed on the other side of the counter!"
--Constance Bennett, to Lana Turner in "Madame X."

"I belong to.... all men."
--Lana Turner in "The Prodigal."

"There's no such thing as 'great men.' There's only men."
--Elaine Stewart, "The Bad and the Beautiful."

Anything Mae West ever said.

I may have seen better days, but I still can't be had for the price of a cocktail, like a salted peanut.

Bette Davis, All About Eve

Or..

"Would you mind sitting over there Shirley? Body odour offends me"

Bette Davis, The Anniversary

"It took more than one man to change my name to...Shanghai Lily." (Dietrich in Shanghai Express)

Regarding the Valley of the Dolls quote about Broadway not going for booze and dope, I always wondered...what Broadway is SHE talking about?

From Sextette:

"Tonight baby, we're making up for lost time." - George Hamilton, late 30s, playing Mae West's long-lost husband

"Don't hold your breath!" - Mae, 84

"Last time I saw a mouth like that, it had a hook in it."
- Caddyshack

"I've had two years to grow claws, Mother. Jungle Red!" - Norma Shearer in The Women

and - paraphrasing from a later Joan Crawford movie - "Both you and your rabbit-faced wife can go to hell!"

AND THE CLASSICS:

"Tear down that bitch of a retaining wall, and put in a window where one ought to be!" - Faye Dunaway, Mommie Dearest

"This isn't my first time at the rodeo, fellas." - Faye Dunaway in Mommie Dearest

"Christina! Bring me the axe!" - FD, MD

"I should have known you'd know where to find the boys and the booze." FD, MD

"But ya are in a wheelchair, Blanche! Ya are!" Bette Davis, Whatever Happened....

Speaking of Mae West:

Leticia Van Allen (Mae): Oohh, a cowboy! Tell me dear, how tall are you without your horse?

Cowboy: Well M'am, I'm six feet, seven inches.

Leticia Van Allen (Mae): Well, never mind about the six feet, let's go talk about the seven inches...

Mae West, age 77 in Myra Breckinridge, 1970

***************************************

BUT, my actual alltime fav camp movie line is uttered by the main character, Sheridan Whiteside (Monty Wooley) to Nurse Preen (Mary Wickes) in the Man Who Came To Dinner (1942):

Nurse Preen: You shouldn't be eating those chocolates, Mr. Whiteside.

Sheridan: Why not?

Nurse Preen: They're bad for your health.

Sheridan: My great aunt Jennifer at a whole box of chocolates every day of her life, until she died at the age of 104. And when she had been dead for three days, she looked better than you do now.

There was a dance industrial track in Chicago in the early 90s that feature a lot those one liners called Bitch Queens by FourOnTheFloor It was quite wonderful.

Anything from the Women.

"your dirty pillas are showing"
"there called breast mama"
- Carrie

"She looks better than a ten-inch dick and you know it!" (Lin Tucci in Showgirls)

"I used to love Doggy Chow, too!" (Elizabeth Berkley in Showgirls, of course)

we looked like a monkey fucking a football out there.

Randy Quaid - Days of Thunder

Every word uttered by Barbara Stanwyck in "Walk On The Wild Side"

Clairee from Steel Magnolias when she says. and I paraphrase "If you don't have anything nice to say about her, come over and sit right next to me"

"I AM SUPERWOMAN!!!!!!!"- Barzell in Beyond The Valley of the Dolls who reveals to Lance his dirty little secret. Lance's reaction causes Ronnie to go off with his head. Poor Lance, he was beheaded in a loin-cloth. Actually anything Ronnie Barzell said was completely campy.

I second anything that ever came out of Mae West's mouth.

"You unmitigated piece of shit!"- Myra Breckenridge

THE FUCK CHAMBER!- Pink Flamingos

For an unexpected source of funny lines in an otherwise (supposedly) serious project, I recommend one of Roger Moore's Bond movies, Moonraker. More authentically camp than the Austin Powers series. Too many to list here, so if you don't mind clicking on the link, I guarantee a few smiles and groans:

http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0079574/quotes

Just about every line from THE OSCAR is yowling camp, but this one is my favorite:

Kay Bergdahl: If a woman doesn't treasure herself, how can a man treasure her?

Frankie Fane: You make my head hurt with all that poetry.

"You have been found guilty of assholism..." Divine in Pink Flamingos.
"Mah parents are gonna be real sorry if I don't get them cha-cha heels." Divine in Female Trouble
"Not THE Baby Jane Hudson?" Victor Buono
"They thought I wasn't crazy and they released me, but I'm crazy." Paraphrased English Subtitle from Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown.
Also the burning bed scene from that movie.

Also from "The Oscar":

Studio head Joseph Cotten to Frankie Fane's agent Milton Berle: "You bring me meat. Prime rib of Gloria, shoulder cut of Johnny, filet Fane."

Tony Bennett as Hymie Kelly: "Lie down with pigs, you come up smellin' like garbage." (repeated at least three times)

I can't find any quick documentation to prove it, but I believe it was Joan Blondell in "Gold Diggers of 1933" - "As long as there are streets, honey, you'll have a job.

"It must be weird, not having anybody cum on you."
--Robert Davi in Showgirls

"There's no need to get personal, love; I shan't do your hair nicely" -- to Liz Taylor in X, Y and Zee

"There's no need to get personal, love; I shan't do your hair nicely" -- to Liz Taylor in X, Y and Zee

All About Eve: "Please don't play governess, Karen. I haven't your unyielding good taste. I wish I could have gone to Radcliffe too, but father wouldn't hear of it. He needed help behind the notions counter. I'm being rude now, aren't I? Or should I say, ain't I?"

Keep it going. There are some real gems here.

"Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Listen, hit the bars, work some parties, and get me transvestites. I need transvestites. All right. Bye.

Bela Lugosi: Eddie, what kind of a movie is this?"

Ed Wood - Johnny Depp

JOHNNY GUITAR -

Vienna: Who are you?! And you, and you, to break into my house with your angry faces and evil minds?!

And also from that campfest, Mercedes McCambridge screaming: "Kill Vienna!"

And from CALAMITY JANE when Doris Day goes to a city for the first time and does a whiplash turnaround to check out a finely bedecked woman: "I never knew a woman could look so purty."

From "..BABY JANE?": "I think there's rats in the cellar."

From "COBRA WOMAN": "Gif me the Cobra
jewels."

VALLEY OF THE DOLLS -
Neely O'Hara: "I have to get up at five o'clock in the morning and SPARKLE, Neely, SPARKLE!"

"Face it Momma. I was the slut of all time."

Elizabeth Taylor in "Butterfield 8".

The extremely self-involved Lana Turner to Juanita Moore after a decades-long relationship in "Imitation of Life" says: "Why, Annie... I didn't realize you had friends."

Also from "Imitation of Life", Lana Turner says to Susan Kohner:

"You weren't being colored, you were just being childish."

"Do you mind if I smoke while you eat?" ---Deep Throat

"Butterfield 8":

Laurence Harvey: "But I can't go on like this, disappointing you."

Dina Merrill: "Can't you try?"

"Female on the Beach": "I wouldn't be interested in you if you were hung upside down, with diamonds!"

Liz in "Reflections in a Golden Eye":

"Firebird? Why on earth did you get on him? You know you can't horseback well enough to ride him! You say he ran away? IS HE LOOSE?"

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