Sans girlfriend

That's just what you'll get in the current column [CLICK HERE], as I divulge what a lesbyterian friend of mine feels about what makes the kooky Lindsay/Sam conjoinment tick.

Also in the column: The guy who steals purses in nightclubs; Divine's late, loved mother; club kid prisoner Michael Alig and his mother; movie inmate Jim Carrey fucking a muscle bear cellmate; lacerating playwright Neil LaBute joking about Jeremy Piven; Elaine Strich acting all unhappy because she was seated near me at the theater; and most importantly, a trip to the Hose, the hot East Village gay bar where you see people's hoses.

Cigarette?

Crazily enough, the movie I Love You, Phillip Morris, in which Jim Carrey plays a real-life man who's mad for the title character portrayed by Ewan McGregor, might not get a theatrical release in the US because people are too squeamish about a gay sex scene in it.

What could be so awful--does Adam Sandler try to join them, still pretending to be gay from the rotten I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry?

Well, Lewis Tice, who does p.r. and marketing for TLA Video, saw the film, and told me what he got from it: