Don't hit your ex-girlfriend over the head with a toilet tank lid.

That's the heady message behind Ryan Idol's plight.

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James Huntsman

In the new issue of Just Us Boys, straight guys who happen to star in gay porn take a break from pretending to enjoy sodomy to offer some insights into their nonstop array of method acting challenges.

Here are some of the highlights:

JAMES HUNTSMAN

Q: How do you mentally prepare for a scene?

A: Show up with a boner, everything else falls into place.

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Zeb Atlas and Brent Corrigan. Photo: Chris Green

If the event I'm about to describe had been held in New York...I still wouldn't have been there.

But it was in L.A. and I got a press release summing it up in florid porny detail, so I feel like I went, and I'm ready to pass it all on to you as if serving a pearl necklace:

"The other night at Scotty B's 'Cocktails with the Stars,' at Micky's, Brent Corrigan and Rocky Houston had a surprise guest, Zeb Atlas.

"Rocky told everyone that he was 'back in the biz,' and has signed with the Premiere Artists for film & internet work and live appearances.

"He is also available for 'private meetings' via Meet The Stars.

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UPDATE: Bravo tells me Eklund has been addressing his porn days in interviews and it will come up in the very first episode of the show. Bravo, Bravo!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Tomorrow night, Bravo launches its spinoff called Million Dollar Listing New York, starring handsome real estate agent Frederik Eklund.

But one thing missing from the press releases and bios is that Eklund was once known as gay porn star Tag Erikkson.

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James Deen is no relation to Paula Deen, though he does do amazing things with cream sauce.

At 26, he's emerged as a top porn star in the hetero adult-film world, which is rare, since the industry usually emphasizes busty women over sizzling men.

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David Shankbone/Wikipedia

This sizzling Chelsea contretemps was just fed to me by a friend of gay-porn man Michael Lucas.

I'll present it as it came in and then follow it with Whaley's response.

"According to an insider, Michael Lucas, CEO of Lucas Entertainment, is having a feud with his next door neighbor and actor Frank Whaley (Pulp Fiction, Swing Kids) over the placement of a door.

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Chuck Holmes founded Falcon Studios, helping to bring porn out of the bookstores and into the living room, but he did so much more than that.

He helped fund the gay movement with his profits, being one of the people who erected HRC (the Human Rights Campaign).

And Holmes found that though his money was welcome, his association wasn't always.

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I just ran across photos of a guy calling himself Jean Paul Roccard, which made me wonder what other great names a sex god could come up with for some wordplay before all the foreplay and sexplay.

Here's what my great literary quest resulted in:

Vlad the Impaler

Jizzy Johnson

Barry M. Enema

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In Justusboys.com magazine, gay porn god Matthew Rush remembers his upbringing "in the middle of nowhere Pennsylvania."

Matthew remembers thinking he was white since his mom, dad, and brothers certainly were.

But it turned out that Mom (while married to "Dad") had carried on with an African-American man and Matthew was the racy result -- though that was never discussed around the house.

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That's what happened to Samuel Colt, who relates his delightful coming out story to the Sword column in JustUsGuys.com magazine.

It's so far from the usual pained recollection that I wanted to pop confetti out my backside and sing ragtime tunes as I read it.

You see, Colt once got a call from his mother asking if he was by any chance on the cover of a magazine that had just come out.

He knew that he was, and it wasn't exactly U.S. News & World Report.

"Yes," he haltingly answered. "Where are you?"

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