There seem to be an endless web of weird telemarketing companies that have nefarious links to each other and constantly offer me the oddest combination of things. My last entry was about a call I got that promised me a free cruise if I completed a survey. I'm not sure exactly what they do with this information, but I bet they turn it into cash. At the end of the survey they then offered me some weird too-good-too-be-true health program. I decided to decline. A few days later, I got a call offering me the cruise. It was a free trip with no strings—except I needed to pay $118 in border crossing fees right away (perhaps that would be a simple way to keep illegal aliens out? Where would they get the money if they can only work once they're here! Feel free to forward my plan to the Senate.)

Here's the call.

I get a lot of wrong numbers and telemarketers calling my landline. People frequently try to fax things meant to go to a hospital to my house. I'm not really sure why. I don't mind though. If I'm busy, I tell telemarketers to calls back. And if not, I talk to them and try to understand what they want. My favorite thing about most new telemarketing companies is that a recording will call you. The recorded person is often informal and just wants to be your pal. In this case, it was someone named Casey. He claims to have convinced his company that because people hate filling out surveys, they should send those who agree on a cruise. They also seem to be trying to sell me health care. Anyway, here is the call.