OMG, is that from American Apparel??

Here's the thing. I know I'm no great thinker. My entertainment choices are nothing to be proud of. If I had DVR, I would probably tape The Real Housewives of Orange County. When I see a heinous accident on the highway, my urge is to pull over and take photos. But Project Runway (which I love and will watch as long as it's on, despite the headline of this post) is beginning to offend my intellect.

Here is a picture of the mean Asian randomly sewing a bunch of denim onto the bottom of a jacket she probably snatched out of someone else's arms to begin with because, as she likes to announce, she's competitive.

Well, even though the fat guy made a dress that would only be appropriate for the love interest in a Color Me Badd video, he's hanging in for another week. It seems Bravo couldn't resist a bitch-off between Jillian and Victorya's heinous coat-dress-things. Jillian's might have been even uglier, but at least it seemed harder to make, and there you have it.

Other things that happened in this episode:

Last night, the Project Runway producers thought they figured out a way to please their fans, some of whom may be straight females or gay men. Not the Tiki Barber part, but the part with the man models in their panties. Unfortunately, watching people try to make suits is really boring.

The news of this episode: muscle-faced model guy is HIV positive and has never felt better. He also won the challenge, but it barely counted. Joey Fat One is now Joey Straight One. His geometric facial hair survived for another week, unfortunately, but Carmen did not. Thank God. We couldn't look at her giant chokers for another minute. Ms. Polymorphic Spitmark will slobber on her drapings, but chooses only to touch one male. Wilmer cried hysterically again, Nina and Michael are still as orange as possible, and the gay teenager loves Asians. See you next week.

Last Wednesday, also known as Thanksgiving Eve, when we were out with a friend who believes this to be the greatest drinking night of the year, episode two of Project Runway happened.

We finally caught up, and guess what? It turned out to be the episode of inappropriate weeping. We're so down for that. First, the fat guy cried because Sarah Jessica Parker showed up. He moved to New York because of Sex and the City. Oh God.

First off, dear readers, we apologize for not being able to bring you our Runway reactions yesterday. There were technical reasons for this that are beyond our comprehension, but we're here for you now.

The first episode of Season 4 was, as always, a lot to take in. With so many designers to meet, the drama hasn't developed yet. But thank God for Elisa, right? As soon as we heard about the marionettes and saw her mushing some chiffon into the grass, we knew this was our girl. ("I decided to imbue it with a natural element.") And, even though her dress was "pooing fabric," we knew the producers couldn't let her go either. ("so I decided to create a cascade, almost like water, or magic... a haiku of a cut.") Thanks, Bravo!