Real Dives: Irish Haven
Real Dives: In which we recommend authentically divey dive bars. A real dive bar may be characterized by low prices, clientele over 60, trucker hats only on actual truckers, a long history, lotto, lack of ironic PBR, and a sense that it is not trying to impress you, or anyone else, ever. The kind of place you worry will soon be replaced by some godawful glass condo.
Today's dive: Irish Haven
Clientele: Mostly genuinely friendly men over 55, one with a brogue. The bar is open 24 hours, and the bartender noted that things can get rough around 4am, when the fellows come in with "short guy syndrome" or with "beer muscles." (He has a way with a turn of phrase.) Also, he will have you know that he doesn't let the cokeheads snort up in the bathroom.
On the walls: An Irish flag, and an American flag; the mounted, taxidermied head of a deer wearing a green felt leprechaun hat; poster showing cottages of Ireland; two pictures of the World Trade Center, a movie poster and stills from The Departed, because a scene in the movie was filmed here--the one where Leonardo DiCaprio asks for cranberry juice and the guy next to him asks if he's on his period.
On the sound system: Gaelic folk from a jukebox; Goodfellas on a television
On tap: PBR, Budwieser and Guinness
What to drink: Guinness, $4
Overheard: A patron introducing us to the bartender: "Have you met Fast Eddie?"
5721 Fourth Avenue, Brooklyn