Apartment Vermin: If You Can't Beat 'Em,
Eat 'Em! Recipes for Cooking Your Pests.

Categories: Eating, Recipes

Who needs Dean & DeLuca?

Ah, city living. The museums, the opera, the vermin. Damn annoying, those pests, making
themselves so at home in your apartment. An urban inevitability, perhaps, but if so, why
not put them to use, such as saving money on your grocery bill? Make infestation a
good thing, through the following recipes.

Next time you do laundry in your rat-infested basement, make sure to bring along a spear or crossbow. If you can nab one of these alleged "public health nuisances," you can prep them in a variety of ways for dinner.

Try Bordeaux-style grilled rats. Gut and skin rats, then baste them with "a thick sauce of olive oil and crushed shallots," according to Calvin Schwabe, author of Unmentionable Cuisine. His instructions tell you to cook the rats over a crackling fire, but a small countertop grill would probably do the trick.

If you lean more toward "world" cuisine, Schwabe mentions a giant cane rat stew from West Africa. Again, gut and skin a few rats, then pan-fry them "in a mixture of butter and peanut oil." When the meat browns, add tomato, "hot red peppers, and salt." Keep simmering until the flesh softens, and serve with rice.

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