Shake Shack's Nutritional Information: The Ultimate Buzzkill

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Robert Sietsema
Paradise lost

We didn't care when Starbucks began posting nutritional information, because caramel latte frappuccinos are nasty and embarrassing and no one in their right mind would eat a Starbucks pastry, regardless of caloric content. Likewise, we regard fast-food labeling as equal parts amusing diversion and statement of the obvious. But for some reason, we were unprepared to see the nutritional information currently available on the Shake Shack website.

While we knew all along that Shake Shack is fast food, this fact somehow seemed irrelevant, thanks largely to the company's insistence on using ingredients found in nature and the way it cannily markets itself as the cheerfully retro creation of the nicest man in the restaurant industry.

Obviously, a Creamsicle float isn't going to be served at Canyon Ranch, and a double Shack burger will never grace the cover of Cooking Light. Still, learning that the vegetarian 'Shroom burger contains 60 calories more than a Quarter Pounder With Cheese, and that a vanilla concrete boasts 29 grams of fat to a BK Triple Stacker's 18, is a big, fat buzzkill.

And maybe that's because while we expect cheap food made by huge corporations to be bad for us in both physical and existential ways, in the case of Shake Shack, ignorance was inextricably linked to the bliss we've found in many a peanut-butter concrete. Reading its nutritional information was kind of like finding out that teacher you admired in high school had a cocaine problem and liked to dress up in fuzzy animal costumes. We enjoyed our innocence -- forced as it was -- while it lasted. But despite the fact that it has been so cruelly taken from us, we will be back -- Friday's custard flavor is fluffernutter, and there's no way in hell we're missing that.


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9 comments
DDB9000
DDB9000

Buzzkill? Really? Only to those so stupid that they don't know what they're eating. I know damn well when I'm eating food that 'isn't good for me' and no amount of nutritional information is going to stop me if I want the food.

It's odd that nowadays with every kind of thing listed on all packaged food that people remain so ignorant of these things. When I was growing up we didn't have this kind of nutritional information and we still knew then which things were good or bad for us, so why now all the know-nothings?

This article however does meet the guidelines of good nutrition, I suppose, as there is no new nutritional information here. I see a Nutrition Facts box with all zeroes here...

Ken
Ken

Eh whatever. Shake Shack is overpriced, overrated, just plain mediocre food. Wouldn't wait 30 seconds in line for that junk.

Leslie Brill
Leslie Brill

Look on the bright side: the whipped cream looks like the diet option here--guilt free, compared with everything else on the list :)

Caroline
Caroline

I experienced the Shake Shake for the first time Friday night and had an amazing shroom burger and beer. I realized after the first tantilizing bite with cheese oozing out this was no way lo cal. Would I do it again? Yes in a heart beat!

Blah
Blah

That's why you can't eat this stuff everyday, no matter how good it is. Anyway, I enjoy them more as a once in a while treat.

Amy Thomas
Amy Thomas

This is indeed the perfect definition of "Buzzkill". Though, admittedly, when the double cheese was oozing out of my 'shroom burger's deep-fried patties, I knew it was hardly a vegilicious lunch.

Decmac1
Decmac1

The calorie count in the shakes is a surprise. They're not all that large. Yowza.

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