Sadly, there was no panel discussion on Friday's Real Time with Bill Maher, instead the three guests (Billy Joe Armstrong, Chris Rock, and Alice Waters) sat down to individual interviews. Waters' segment was fine, although, oddly, she seems to be developing a faint, Madonna-style British accent.

It was a better appearance for Waters than the 60 Minutes interview. She continues to fight the good fight for everyone's right to good, healthful food, particularly pointing out that poorer families do not have to eat at McDonald's: "Peasant cooking around the world is affordable and delicious, and we need to learn to cook that food again."

That's true, and there's nothing better than peasant cooking, but not everyone knows that. And some might take umbrage to being told they ought to eat "peasant" food. As always, Water's message is absolutely sound, it's the way she presents it that isn't always productive.

[Video via Eater]

We usually watch Real Time with Bill Mahar with the same zeal most reserve for an old-fashioned revival. "Speak it!" we screech, as Maher encourages Obama to tell off Republicans in Tiger-Woods-sexting-style. ("Shut the fuck up while I slap your face for making noise! Now pass the cap-and-trade law, you stupid bitch, and repeat after me, 'global warming is real.'")

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In which we learn that Guy Fieri's parents were hippie-crunchy cooks, that he hates liver, and that he likes to play a very strange game involving tissues and Kristin Stewart.

[via Eater]

Last nights' No Reservations: Hudson Valley was not our favorite of Bourdain's adventures--that The Shining hotel interlude with an uncomfortable-looking Michael Ruhlman took up 20 minutes that could have been devoted to food. And what was up with the Dakota Fanning doppelganger? Still, the scene in the old-timers' bar was priceless, and what food there was looked awfully good.

Plus, we saw the new frontier in movable kitchens.

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Rachel Coleman: Brooklynite, bad cook

​Yes, friends, it's another food reality television show--Worst Cooks in America premieres on the Food Network on January 3. It turns the Top Chef paradigm on its head--instead of being covertly invited to snicker at the flailings of chefs who are meant to be talented, we're urged to root for the redemption of home cooks who have already admitted that they're terrible.

These purported worst cooks in the nation are split into two teams, and submit to cooking boot camp, one team under Anne Burrell, formerly of Centro Vinoteca, and the other under Beau MacMillan, of elements in Phoenix. One by one they are eliminated in cooking challenges, until the last two compete in front of a panel of "esteemed culinary critics" to win $25,000 (and not, we assume the title of Worst Cook in America).

One of the contestants walks among us, in Bushwick, Brooklyn. We caught up with Rachel Coleman about her kitchen disasters, what she learned from Anne Burrell, and what it's like to study reality TV in college, and then actually be on reality TV.

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​Tune in to the CBS Sunday Morning Show from 9 a.m.-10:30 a.m. this Sunday, when their annual food show airs, including a segment on sliders.

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Speaking of food television, a certain person who will not be outed might possibly have a guilty thing for Paula Deen. The way Deen drawls "buuuuuuuuuuteeer" could tame a wild beast. But on her show on the Food Network, Deen looks like an amateur drag queen--sporting a rock hard, puffy coiffure and a disturbing shellacking of make-up. But now she has a channel on YouTube, where you can watch home-video-like segments, showing her in a much more casual light. In this one, she makes pimento cheese in her own kitchen, makeup-free.

[via Slashfood]

Last night, onetime Bravo boy and sometimes Top Chef judge Ted Allen premiered his new  rival show on the Food Network, Chopped. Allen has spoken out against allegations that the show is a Top Chef rip-off, elucidating the differences on his blog, saying "There is no sleep deprivation, no "Big Brother" house full of bunk beds and cameras, no booze-fueled personal drama...Best of all, there is no product placement, so you never see passionate lovers of good food being forced to use packaged convenience junk thanks to Kraft/Altria/Exxon's sponsorship."

That may all be true, but the absence of Diet-Dr.-Pepper Quickfires doesn't make up for the fact that Chopped's format is boring, the talent of its chef-testants subpar, and the general look of the show cheap. We'll take the occasional Bertolli challenge in exchange for some decent production value and an occasional change of scenery. 

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Last night, the Culinary Institute of America at the Astor Center presented a cooking class with Stephanie Izard, the most recent winner of Top Chef. Izard demonstrated two dishes that she cooked on the show: Duck a la orange with braised duck spring rolls and bok choy, and roasted lamb with maitake mushrooms, blackberry gastrique and braised pistachios.

I'm not sure the class functioned so well in terms of actually learning how to make the recipes Stephanie demoed, but by no fault of hers. Some of the necessary prep hadn't been laid out (no hot oil in which to fry), and most of the audience questions were about Top Chef rather than her technique. Stephanie seemed just as genuine, competent and down to earth as she did on the show--she might be the most naturally likable person ever to appear on reality television.

Highlights:

Those braised pistachios that Ted Allen went crazy for on the show were, in reality, totally delicious. And simple: pistachios, chicken stock and salt, simmered for 40 minutes, the end.

After filming the first episode's elimination challenge, and getting freaked out because Anthony Bourdain had walked in, Stephanie had a "little panic attack" and the show's medics had to attend to her.

On Lisa: "She's great. They had to make someone the villain." Lisa is listed in Stephanie's phone as "Leeza," for the way Daniel Boulud pronounced the name.

To braise in a short amount of time (like if you're on Top Chef...or if your friends are coming over for dinner soon) cut the meat into smaller pieces, and braise on the stovetop (rather than in the oven), using slightly higher heat than you otherwise would.

You can save braising liquid (including all the aromatics and seasonings) and use it over and over. Stephanie said that she's worked in kitchens in which the same braising liquid is used for "months and months." Just bring it to a boil every few days for food safety.

On the Dale-Lisa mutual tantrum/Jen-kicking-chair scene: "We were in that room for up to six hours at a time, and there's this big cooler of wine and beer. Jen got upset because Zoe was leaving the show...Dale decides to start screaming at Lisa even though we won...I think that's what they [the producers] want. They were like 'sweet.'"

Stephanie will be opening a "fun, funky gastro-pub" (obvs) in Chicago next spring. She and her partners are currently scouting locations. She's also working on a cookbook.

On a night out with Mario Batali: "He likes to throw back a couple cocktails...I wouldn't recommend drinking three big glasses of Fernet."

Having left her restaurant, Scylla, Stephanie worked as a personal chef for a family in the Hamptons this summer. (Unsurprisingly, she decided personal cheffing was not for her.)

Restaurant recommendations in Chicago: Avec and L20.

Lamb with blackberry gastrique, maitake mushrooms and braised pistachios

Paula Deen's gonna fatten her right up.

Sarah Palin makes me want to throw my television out the window and start setting shit on fire. Luckily for my neighbors, an email from the Food Network arrived just in time to calm me down. Just gaze at the picture above, breathe into a paper bag and think of hot lard. See? All better now.

On Paula Deen's Sept. 20th show (titled "Grease is the Word," of course), Deen will help Michelle Obama get down with the people by teaching her how to fry.

I love Paula Deen...reluctantly. Her show isn't so fantastic, but her voice is better than Valium. Just close your eyes and listen: "And now a halfa pounda butta....And some cream...And we're gonna fry that up in hot laaard." And if she's helping Michelle Obama reach out to lovers of Southern fried food, all the better.

From the press release:

On Saturday September 20th at 7:00pm ET/PT, Michelle gives Paula a taste of her family life on the road to the White House and shares fun facts, including the first meal she made for Barack, what kinds of local foods the family seeks out on the road and that Barack makes a mean chili! And, with Paula showing her secrets for frying up some popular American comfort foods, this is one party viewers won’t want to miss!

And Barak makes a mean chili! You hear that red staters? What's more American than making a mean chili?

I mean...besides American traditions like the high success rate of abstinence-only education, banning books from school libraries and mocking the silly notion of reading prisoners their rights. But chili is right up there!