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**OnlineHost** Welcome to Thriller 25 Recording Studio Chat! |

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FergieBottom: hey michael jackson!
hey type in a girl voice, it'll be funny because michael jackson |

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LazyPunchline: I don't know how to type in a girl voice. |

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FergieBottom: well then talk about the plastic surgery! |

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LazyPunchline: Well, over the course of the last twenty to twenty-five years, I have elected to undergo a series of cosmetic surgeries. Many of said surgeries were performed to alter the appearance of my nose. |

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FergieBottom: hey hey hey
what would happen if someone got a picture of you from when you were younger |

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FergieBottom: and then got another picture of you taken right now |

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FergieBottom: AND THEN SITUATED THE TWO PICTURES ADJACENT TO ONE ANOTHER |

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LazyPunchline: The two pictures would look markedly different. |

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FergieBottom: AHAHAHAHA
OH MY FRIGGIN GOD I'M GONNA GO DO THAT RIGHT NOW |
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**OnlineHost** FergieBottom has danced out of the chatroom. |

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LazyPunchline: Whoa, her butt is still here. |

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william.i.am: Yeah, I know. When she dances, her ass never moves. |

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william.i.am: So let's get down to business. You're calling this album "Thriller 25," right? |

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LazyPunchline: Well, to be truthful, by the time this album is released it will have been 25 years and two months since the release of the original Thriller |

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william.i.am: Man, nobody's gonna care. We could title it "GUY THEY TALK ABOUT ON BEST WEEK EVER SINGS THE RAP MUSIC" and it would sell five million copies. |

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LazyPunchline: True. Okay, so the first song you need to drop vocals on is "The Girl Is Mine 2008." |

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william.i.am: Sure thing. It's been a while, let me give it a read.
/reads lyrics |

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william.i.am: Um.
all right, uh |

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LazyPunchline: Yes? |

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william.i.am: Okay, just to be clear. In the last third of the song, we're, uh. . .we're arguing over a woman, right? Because, I mean, this is 2008, and you're 2008 Michael Jackson, and, uh |

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LazyPunchline: Hmm. |

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LazyPunchline: If you want, we could be arguing about whose turn it is to mow the lawn or something. |

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william.i.am: /stares |

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william.i.am: Okay, here's what we'll do. At the end of the song, I'll just have a one-sided argument with nobody over who gets the girl. |

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LazyPunchline: That works. |

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william.i.am: You know, I don't know whether I should even do this song at all. Are you sure you don't want to let Paul McCartney in here to just do another version of it with you? |

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LazyPunchline: I'm sure. |

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william.i.am: Because he's right there. |

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mccartneyds_an_oil_change: /stands outside, presses face against window glass |

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LazyPunchline: Oh, damn it.
/walks up to glass |

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LazyPunchline: This is the last time. I swear to God, get away from me or you're in for an ass-kicking. |

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mccartneyds_an_oil_change: /sad puppy face |

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LazyPunchline: Hey! Hey. Go fuck yourself, Old Man Coldplay. Go fuck yourself. |

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mccartneyds_an_oil_change: IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ME IN FRONT OF THAT APARTMENT BUILDING! |

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william.i.am: imagine |