Presenting the Top 19 Most Ridiculous Lines on Das Racist's Sit Down, Man
Even casual observers of this blog know of our great esteem for Das Racist, and our great excitement at the release yesterday of their latest mixtape, Sit Down, Man, featuring guests from Diplo to El-P, Boi-1da to Devo Springsteen. Samples include "People Are Strange" and "Return to Innocence." (Yeah, Enigma.) Whole thing is pretty hilarious. Here, we present a primer of the tape's most memorable lines, plotted on a spectrum from least to most ridiculous. I want it known up front that this took way longer than you think it would.
NOT THAT RIDICULOUS...
"White people, play this for your black friends/Black people, smack them."
"These rappers wack like the movie Wackness/They saccharine, but they not Equal/OHHHHH!"
"I'm on the block like street meat/Call me Dwight Shrute the way that I eat beats."
"I'm at the fashion party/I'm wearin' fashion clothes/I'm putting fashionable powders up inside my nose/Lookin' at these fashion friends/Tryin' to make them fashion ends/Tryin' to touch that fashion paper/Like they was fashion pens."
"I'm my own identical cousin/Just call me Patty Duke/I'm stuntin' like my daddy do/"Thug Life" right above my Natty Ice tatty, too/Stupid."
'I'm Himanshu, the one without the beard/People think I'm Spanish 'cause the other one look weird/Look here, nasty, somethin' like Gargamel/That's racist, our complexion is caramel."
"They say/They wanna have my kids like bay-bay/No way-way no bay-bay/That's 18 years like 'Ye say/That's too much to pay-pay."
"Matter of fact, yo, all my boys in bands and shit/Haters mad 'cause they got Costanza dicks."
"All the rage, kid/Save your dollars/Cop that for moms, dads, nanas, papas/Top hats and big wigs powered proper/So on the money he's a founding father."
"I'm counting Jacksons with black friends/I'm counting tens and Benzes with white friends/Wonderin' if suicide's a largely white trend/Google it later and confirm that, aiight then."
"Really though/Frat dudes is like Juggalos/Underrated in the game like Mark Ruffalo."
"Caveman porn star riding on a unicorn/Undercover cop and I'm wearin' a uniform/Plus I wrote all of my rhymes in Cuneiform/Hella years ago B.C., you should be informed/If you don't get it get a computer and Google it/If you find out all the reasons we the shit, then you the shit."
"Alone, Macaulay Culkin/Straw Dogs /Don't even go there again, girlfriend/There's your man/Spray-tanning Dakota Fanning at the Getty gas station/Petty-cash making/Chuck-E-Cheese mousetrap star-power nap 20 minutes like da Vinci did."
"V-I-C droppin' styles you ain't used to/New school, old school Cocoa Puff coo-coo/Choo-choo-choose to be half-Lisa Simpson, half-Ralphie/Put my TV to Puccini falling off the balcony/South Beach Diet/Powder me up, powder me down/White riot/Sublime cover-band types like it/Maybe you should try it/Maybe you should buy it/You should probably buy it."
"We not racist/We love white people/Ford trucks, apple pies, bald eagles/Yeah, Cheetos, Doritos, Fritos, Pringles, Kraft singles, Slim Jim, Sierra Mist."
"Who's in this to win this for the spinach/For the brisket/For the Bisquick/For the biscuits/Make biscuits/Take biscuits/Break biscuits/Break break break chick chick chick tick tick tick bang bang bang didididi-dang didididididi damn/No sleep, no tryptophan/No kick the can/Spinnin' like a ceiling fan/What a feeling, man/Reeling in the years, Steely Dan/For really, fam."
"New Jamba Juice is my house/New my house is your house/My new mouth is your blouse."
"What up, my friend/What up, my friend/Something, something, anything anything anything anything anything anything straaaaaaange." [Reprise of chorus to MC Hammer's "Addams Groove"]
"People is redrum/Redrum is murder/Meat is murder/People are burgers/Transitive property: People are murder."
Go see them perform some of these raps at Santos' Party House Thursday. I'm sure I messed some of them up, and I'm sure I'll hear about it.