Michael Bolton And The Lonely Island Go To The Movies

The Lonely Island's Turtleneck & Chain comes out tomorrow, and the weekend's Saturday Night Live previewed its arrival with "Jack Sparrow," in which Michael Bolton drops by the studio and provides a hook more inspired by his Netflix queue than by nights out in New York City's Meatpacking District. (Who could blame him, etc.) Wonder if the Lonely Island guys got invited to his house during the brainstorming of this song, which melds a standing-on-a-beach-alone chorus and club-ready inanity remarkably well--it almost makes you want to go back in time and swap him out for Rod Stewart on that song from The Three Musketeers that he did with Sting and Bryan Adams.

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Chris Molanphy
Chris Molanphy

Actually, not to quibble, but I'd want to swap Bolton in for *Sting*, not Rod, because then at least the 'Three Musketeers' crapfest would be populated by three confirmed schlock merchants, rather than two schlock merchants plus one formerly respectable guy who was trying (and succeeding) to make himself loathsome.


I kind of like the way Sting's voice meshes with Bryan Adams', though!

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