Why Not Hone Your Writing Chops By Penning Some Das Racist Fan Fiction?

Categories: Das Racist

dasracist_promo.jpg
There are certain points in an artist's life when they can say, "yes, I've become famous." In the current moment, one of those times is when the first piece of fan fiction—stories dreamed up by the masses in which stars embark on adventures that could be as out-of-this-world as Josie & The Pussycats in Outer Space or as raunchy as Emanuelle In Space—focused on that person appears on the Internet. (They don't necessarily have to be in space, mind you. But just think of the plot twists the whole antigravity thing could bring!)

In any event, it looks like Das Racist's Fan Fiction Moment might be arriving pretty soon; earlier this week, someone took to Craigslist with a plea for someone to write a "wild and crazy story of adventure, love, and overcoming adversity" about the group, because, s/he claims, s/he isn't a good enough writer. Which is cute for a couple of reasons: first, like that's stopped people before; and second, so eager is this person to devour some DR fan fiction that s/he's willing to pay $10, which, let's be honest, is more than a lot of other online content outposts out there. The full call for submissions below.

In my lifetime, I have only really known one true love: The Music of queens based hip-hop outfit Das Racist. The zany lyrics of Kool A.D. and Heems, as well as the crazy stage antics of hypeman Dapwell has done nothing but warm my heart for many a year that I have been listening to them. From such hard hitting songs as "Rainbow In The Dark" and "Power" to sweet seranades like "Coochie Dip City", Das Racist have become a sountrack to my life. There has to be some way I can repay them, and there is only one way I can think of that:

Fan fiction.

I however, am not good at writing. That is why I am asking you, prospective author, to write me a wonderful tale about Das Racist! Some kind of wild and crazy story of adventure, love, and overcoming adversity.

PRERQUSITES:
Familiarity with the music of Das Racist ("Sit Down, Man" "Shut Up, Dude" "Relax" and the B-sides compilation)
Knowledge of Shaun Bridgmohan
The ability to "Bring it"
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So please message me if you are interested! Let's show some appreciation for these wonderful young men who are on the way to fame!

Well? Get cracking! And feel free to put teasers in the comment section.

[HT Phillip.]

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2 comments
Dapperdon
Dapperdon

It was a cold and stormy night. Heems was sitting in a pizza parlor on Jamaica Avenue, dreaming of a scheme. His phone buzzed and rippled in his tight pant pocket. Front left, as always. He ignored it.

"Another slice, broccoli," he yelled at the pizza master, a middle-aged Mexican from Panama.

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