The Golden Globes Pit Madonna Vs. Gaga (And Elton) Vs. Mary J. Vs. Sinéad Vs. Chris (Cornell)

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Sure, the Golden Globes are a big excuse for celebrities to get soused and congratulate each other, but this year's offering of Best Original Song nominees has a neat wrinkle: Lady Gaga and Madonna are facing off against one another, with Gaga up for her weirdly Bee Gees-evoking Elton John collab "Hello Hello" (from Gnomeo & Juliet) and Madonna nominated for "Masterpiece," a sweeping ballad from the Madge-directed flick W.E. If you are confused by the existence of this song, because how can a Madonna song fall in the forest of New York City and not make much of a sound, worry not; it only premiered to those of us not on the Globes' nominating committee last week. Also up for the award are Mary J. Blige (for a track from The Help), Sinéad O'Connor, and Soundgarden frontman Chris Cornell. What year is this again? All five nominees available for your streaming perusal below.

Mary J. Blige, "The Living Proof" (The Help)

Chris Cornell, "The Keeper" (Machine Gun Preacher)

Elton John/Lady Gaga, "Hello Hello" (Gnomeo & Juliet)

Madonna, "Masterpiece" (W.E.)

Sinéad O'Connor, "Lay Your Head Down" (Albert Nobbs)

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the Madonna song is missing but absent that, my vote is Sinead, Mary J Blige, and I disqualify Gaga and Chris Cornell from consideration. I could not get past the first two lines of his song, and Elton's should have been trimmed by half. Elton did make some of the longest songs ever for pop radio, but this one feels repetitious. What they should have done and should do is this. Lady Gaga should go through Elton's 70's albums from his earliest work up through Blue Moves and write an album that basically guts his catalog the way she's been accused of doing with... other artists.

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