Lady Gaga's Parents' Restaurant Is Already Having Bad Romances With Critics

gagaeatingpasta.jpg
Look, everyone, a whole blog about Lady Gaga eating pasta.
Last night was the opening night for Joanne, the new Italian restaurant opened by the parents of Stefani "Lady Gaga" Germanotta and chef Art Smith, who was recently spotted making salami waffles with the pop star on her Thanksgiving special. Used to be that a restaurant would be able to get its sea legs before being subjected to the wrath of reviewers, but in an effort to goose his section's pageviews get the early scoop the New York Post's Steve Cuozzo snagged a table at the West 68th Street eatery last night and went to town on the eats. He was not very impressed!

Appetizers took 50 minutes to arrive. Grilled calamari with bitter greens and radicchio were the worst I've had in a lifetime of squid-mongering, the salad unseasoned and the calamari like leather. One-note orecchiette with shellfish recalled the flaccid pasta commonly doled out along Long Island's Jericho Turnpike -- or at 35,000 feet. Unspeakably fatty veal osso bucco was $38. In a review the other day, I criticized the same dish at new Caffe Storico, where it cost only $28. Come back, Caffe Storico! All's forgiven.

Jericho Turnpike? Ouch. To be fair to Cuozzo, the menu does look a bit expensive and amateurishly worded (do people who have the funds to drop $28 on it really need to be reminded that orechiette is a type of pasta?). And the place was touted on the aforementioned Thanksgiving special, so his assertion that the restaurant has the "windiest hype machine east of the Pacific" isn't entirely unfounded (although one wonders if he's heard of Lana Del Rey yet). Our colleagues at Fork In The Road have yet to weigh in, and as someone who ate at Britney Spears' doomed midtown eatery Nyla back in the day (decent portobello burger, okay fries), I am very curious to see what they think.

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6 comments
M's Agenda
M's Agenda

Madonna is not a real artist, she pays for the song-credits.  Madonna is an opportunistic self-absorbed person who is jealous of other people’s success — specially people like Lady Gaga, Mariah Carey, Janet Jackson, Celine Dion, Cher, and so on.  She uses young artists as a way to always keep herself relevant

M's Agenda
M's Agenda

This is obviously a ploy done by MADONNA to try to bring down Gaga's parents' restaurant. MADONNA is an evil and sick woman. She knows no limits. She will even try to attack Gaga on a personal level, attacking Gaga's parents restaurant reputation. This woman needs mercy from God, because she is a sad individual. She has no talents and needs to resort to stuff like this. SHAME.

The restaurant was not open for the press, yet there comes this EXTREMELY BIASED article WITH THE ONLY INTENTION to make everyone think the restaurant is bad. This is an EVIL PLOY. Madonna, you are so talentless that you need to go so LOW? You are VERY SICK AND EVIL.

M's Agenda
M's Agenda

Monsters, go to NY POST AND don't let this guy talk bad about Gaga's parents' restaurant. It was NOT Open to the press. YET there is this evil article!!! Connect the dots. MAdonna is responsible for this!

Burgtoo
Burgtoo

Um, Lana Del Ray needs to stop having her fucking promotion team put out articles like this with her name randomly being in it so she can garner attention. I'll never buy an album or a song from her just because of this. 

maura
maura

i swear to you, i was not paid to write that (apparently failed!) joke. (i did see an ad for her record on taxi tv the other night though. IS NOWHERE SAFE, etc.)

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