Let's Imagine What DJ Khaled's Kiss The Ring Will Sound Like
6. Kanye West & Rick Ross, "I Wish You Would" (produced by Hit-Boy)
"I Wish You Would" is a remake of "Go Hard," a Kanye/T-Pain single off of Khaled's 2008 album We Global, which itself was a remake of Kanye's Autotune-soaked verse on Young Jeezy's "Put On." Spoiler alert: the returns have diminished.
5. Rick Ross, Lil Wayne, Nicki Minaj & Chris Brown, "Take It to the Head" (produced by The Runners)
Putting together a group of hot rappers, an R&B singer, and The Runners is a timeless DJ Khaled recipe. It worked the first time ("I'm So Hood") but has become more and more stale ever since. The 2012 version naturally features Chris Brown, but the song is just boring and forgettable in a rather ordinary way. They did sort of make up for it with the video, though, where Brown sings from inside an electric cage (?) on the premises of some sort of malfunctioning water treatment plant (??). You know, typical stuff.
4. Ace Hood, "Outro (They Don't Want War)" (produced by DJ Toomp)
Yeah, this is about where any Ace Hood solo track ranks in the hierarchy of contemporary rap. DJ Toomp is a genius who has more or less disappeared from popular rap in the last two years, but the fact that his beat here is being wasted on merely Ace Hood just drives this song further down the list. On the bright side, at least it's not Wale.
3. Wale, Tyga, Mack Maine & Kirko Bangz, "Don't Pay 4 It" (produced by The Runners)
Oh, hey, it's Wale! This song is notable for having quite possibly the most hilarious selection of rappers on any Khaled song. (Kirko Bangz especially did well to make it on a Khaled album before his slide into irrelevancy.) But what really drives this up the list is the presence of The Runners, whose incessant bigness is a really awful match with this foursome.
2. J. Cole, Big K.R.I.T. & Kendrick Lamar, "They Ready" (produced by J. Cole)
These three guys are touted as some of the most exciting young talents in popular rap, and in each case that proclamation has at least some degree of truth. But putting them together is just an incredibly obvious and pandering move, a late, out-of-touch MTV segment or Rolling Stone sidebar brought to life. As boring as Khaled's collections of major starpower can be, they at least bring together well-known people. The grouping of Cole, K.R.I.T. and Lamar is undoubtedly supposed to mean something, but it just looks really minor.
1. Big Sean, Wiz Khalifa, Ace Hood & T-Pain, "I'm So Blessed" (produced by K.E.)
On its face, this is a standard collection of average and/or obnoxious rappers who have no reason to be on a track together aside from their fame. (Plus, of course, T-Pain.) But, man, a track where Big Sean (I repeat: Big Sean) and Wiz Khalifa get to slip into a false humility to rap about how "blessed" they are? That's a special, new circle of hell, even in the world of DJ Khaled.