A Handy Flowchart For Selecting Your 2012 CMJ Panels, Day 2
Categories: CMJ, Elaborate Web Shenanigans, Passive-Aggressive Satire, Using the Word 'Industry', Vijith Assar
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| John Bylander |
While you folks were all wearing yourselves out running around between CMJ showcases yesterday, I just guzzled a bunch of free booze at a press-only party and then ran home to giggle at the two boring rich dudes angrily discussing the details of their pension plans on national television. Hope it was worth it, because my own personal energy strategy was to turn in early and rest up for today's daytime programming, easily the highlight of CMJ for those of us who have no idea who the hell any of these bands are. (Pleased to meet you, Milk Dick.) But I bet you've heard of Kickstarter, SoundCloud, and TechCrunch, all of which are sending their top brass to dispense pearls and/or turds of music industry advice at today's panel discussions. No, I won't tell you where to find any of them; instead, please parse your various options using the decision tree we've thoughtfully provided.
Wednesday, October 17th
Is your hard drive full?
Yes
The Cloud Hovers
Opinions on the direction of cloud computing will challenge attendees rain or shine. How do musicians feel about the fact that most "premium" accounts allow any files to be shared freely? How do labels feel about the cloud? All benefits and tribulations will be discussed in what will no doubt be a very lively discussion.
2pm in Kimmel 406
Opinions on the direction of cloud computing will challenge attendees rain or shine. How do musicians feel about the fact that most "premium" accounts allow any files to be shared freely? How do labels feel about the cloud? All benefits and tribulations will be discussed in what will no doubt be a very lively discussion.
2pm in Kimmel 406
No
Do you ever find yourself wishing the music industry could be just a little more ass-backwards than it already is?
Yes
Becoming An Artist: Working Backwards From The Beginning
It's 2013, you're a musician, and you've decided to get serious about making something happen in your career. Where do you start and what can you do to build your brand? Industry troubadours will expose the hazards to avoid, the channels on which to focus, and the lighted path to follow.
11am in Kimmel 406
It's 2013, you're a musician, and you've decided to get serious about making something happen in your career. Where do you start and what can you do to build your brand? Industry troubadours will expose the hazards to avoid, the channels on which to focus, and the lighted path to follow.
11am in Kimmel 406
I'm all set, thanks.
Are you truly maximizing your presence in the lucrative Nokia Lumia 920 market?
No
We Are Left To Our Own Devices (And Apps)
A new device or gadget seems to hit the market every other minute. These experts in-the-know reveal what's hot, what's next and the cool applications that are driving these devices.
11am in Kimmel 905/907
A new device or gadget seems to hit the market every other minute. These experts in-the-know reveal what's hot, what's next and the cool applications that are driving these devices.
11am in Kimmel 905/907
We just printed up these sweet new band logo stickers which are about the right size for the back of a cell phone.
Do you already own a microphone cable?
Yes
The Two Most Important Elements Of Digital Recording: Microphone And Preamp
There are many Digital Audio Workstations to choose from when recording music to a computer. Yet the two most important elements of a recording remain the microphone and preamp. This panel of experts will explain exactly how an analogue signal passes through a microphone and preamp to give you recorded sound. What are the microphones and preamps to look for, and which ones should you stay away from?
12:30pm Kimmel 406
There are many Digital Audio Workstations to choose from when recording music to a computer. Yet the two most important elements of a recording remain the microphone and preamp. This panel of experts will explain exactly how an analogue signal passes through a microphone and preamp to give you recorded sound. What are the microphones and preamps to look for, and which ones should you stay away from?
12:30pm Kimmel 406
No
You already have both of these prerequisites, right?
[resigned sigh]
Dumb Band, Smart Phone
A Smartphone can be an artist's best friend. This panel goes deep into new mobile technologies for the modern artist.
12:30pm in Kimmel 905/907
A Smartphone can be an artist's best friend. This panel goes deep into new mobile technologies for the modern artist.
12:30pm in Kimmel 905/907
Can't afford a data plan.
Do you have a valid commercial driver's license?
Yes
An Intervention On Career Reinvention
As mergers, consolidations and their requisite downsizing abound, what does it take to reinvent your career? How do you find a lane and forge your own new opportunities? Many have done it and are finding a rewarding path.
2pm in Kimmel 405
As mergers, consolidations and their requisite downsizing abound, what does it take to reinvent your career? How do you find a lane and forge your own new opportunities? Many have done it and are finding a rewarding path.
2pm in Kimmel 405
No
Are you good at making sock puppets?
No
Creating A [Cost] Effective Modern Music Video
A music video -- in all its multiple platforms and forms -- remains one of the most compelling and effective tools for today's musician. What are the costs and line items inside a music video budget? Hear great advice on story plots, planning and executing, as well as salient advice on how to avoid pitfalls.
2pm in Kimmel 905/907
A music video -- in all its multiple platforms and forms -- remains one of the most compelling and effective tools for today's musician. What are the costs and line items inside a music video budget? Hear great advice on story plots, planning and executing, as well as salient advice on how to avoid pitfalls.
2pm in Kimmel 905/907
You should seriously check out my Etsy storefront sometime.
Do you have MULTIPLE fans?
Yes
Fan-durance
"Direct To Fan" can be a compelling strategy for young artists, but there are many hurdles to overcome. How can artists unite their fanbase to build a revenue stream? We'll reveal pitfalls to beware of and specific methods and tools that work.
3:30pm in Kimmel 802 (Shorin studio)
"Direct To Fan" can be a compelling strategy for young artists, but there are many hurdles to overcome. How can artists unite their fanbase to build a revenue stream? We'll reveal pitfalls to beware of and specific methods and tools that work.
3:30pm in Kimmel 802 (Shorin studio)
No
Start with that, Einstein. Best of luck at your show tonight; bring us good news tomorrow morning and we'll take it from there.
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