Fuck A Critic: What's A Dog Think of New Releases From Meek Mill, Taylor Swift, Aerosmith, and More?


That's Francie, above. The greatest pug in the history of pugs. She's 9. And she loves music. Lives for it. She especially likes electronic music, with all the bleeps and bloops, the thwooooooshhhhes and zhhhrrmmmm and so forth. Anything Warp Records, she's all over that shit like it's a bowl full of Beggin' Strips. But she's into a pretty wide variety of stuff. Her whole life, she's loyally sat beside me as I've worked at my computer, listening along with me to a ton of music of all types. Which makes her pretty qualified to offer her take on a batch of new tunes. And quite honestly, who gives a fuck about po-faced, self-absorbed music critics and their boring, pointless 2,000-word reviews? I played Francie a few songs, and these were her real, honest-to-God reactions.

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Paul Banks, "The Base"


Lifts head from dog bed, tilts head to right at electronic noises whirring through speakers at :06. Looks around room. Licks at front left paw for a few seconds. Puts head back down in blanket when Paul Banks starts singing at :21. Ears down. Inhales deeply. Eyes closed by 1:21. Perceptible snoring at 2:31.

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