Ten Music Artists Who Are Dead Inside

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Last week, acclaimed movie director Dave Grohl told the 15 people who were accidentally watching him fill in as host on Chelsea Lately that Britney Spears "seems dead inside" to him. Disregarding how weird it is to discuss someone's inner-deadness on the Chelsea Handler set without talking about Chelsea Handler, it made us wonder what other music artists are dead inside. Ten came to us instantly, so we stopped there, because it's proper list size.

See also: In Defense of Dave Grohl

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Skrillex
Sometime in 2010 people started getting really into Skrillex without realizing that they were actually eavesdropping on private extra-sensory radio signals sent into the spiritual realm by someone who is dead on the inside. Skrillex's records are his attempt to phone home. The only drops in his songs happen when he falls to his knees in prayer that his human form will join his spiritual one. His music is not an anthem. His music is a plea. RIP.

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Kanye West
Although Kanye West was on his way to becoming dead on the inside between the release of his sophomore and junior albums, what really put the nail in his spiritual coffin was getting involved with the Kardashians. It's actually physically painful to listen to his first album and compare that to the sounds he makes now. When the Illuminati took Kanye's sperm and injected it into Kim's ass they also took his talent and his soul. RIP.

See also: The Kanye You Once Loved Is Dead and Gone

Location Info

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Hammerstein Ballroom

311 W. 34th St., New York, NY

Category: Music

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7 comments
nickcicero
nickcicero

Adele has been Mother Theresa of sound - perfect hahaha

epac666
epac666 topcommenter

I love people who make fun of Brittany Spears. I mean...why not?

TacomaWaforLife
TacomaWaforLife

Spell check that Title Jay Stephens...

Your High School English Teacher

richaod
richaod

What is "dead inside", if not a listicle split into FIVE PAGES for more views? :'(

jaysteps
jaysteps

@TacomaWaforLife Your anonymity is raising my blood pressure. And I fixed the title, Mrs....Kra...or...Bul...or...Wins...? Whoever you are I hope you're happy.

Paw1
Paw1

How about a print edition with one feature article (tops, two), one column plus Savage, some listings and ads on every single page (most full page)?

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