Things Outkast Is Cooler Than: The Complete List

Categories: Outkast

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Outkast perform at Governors ball Friday, June 6.
Outkast have made something of an art form out of cleverly describing their own level of "cool." Though the Atlanta duo is far from the first rap group to do so, Big Boi and Andre 3000 have certainly made a game out of it, employing all manner of wordplay in their explanations of the matter. "Cooler than a polar bear's toenails," from 1996's ATLiens, is likely the most well-known example.

Below, in advance of the duo's performance at this weekend's Governors Ball, you will find a list of every single thing the members of Outkast have lyrically asserted themselves to be cooler than, along with carefully thought-out, scientific explanations. Let's dig in.

See also: The 10 Best Male Rappers of All Time

A Polar Bear's Toenails

Song: "ATLiens"

The Arctic Circle, native habitat of the polar bear, routinely drops below -58 degrees Fahrenheit. The region is blanketed in snow and ice, which the polar bear walks around on regularly, getting ice up under its toes and such. Therefore, it is reasonable to say that the polar bear's toenails, constantly caked in snow, are the coolest part of its body.

But, as Big Boi notes in this 1996 classic off of ATLiens, Outkast is, in fact, cooler than that.

The Pussy on a Penguin in the Summer

Song: "Higher Res"

The summer is considered to be the warmest of the four temperate seasons, with the earth tilted in such a way that it faces the sun. The penguin is an aquatic, flightless bird whose native habitat is in Antarctica, an ice-covered continent whose temperatures sometimes reach as low as −129 degrees Fahrenheit.

Penguins have exceptionally short, stubby legs. Therefore, their anatomy is such that their genitals are very low to the ground. Heat transfer, through a process of diffusion, would cause said penguin genitals to reach lower temperatures when in close proximity to the ice beneath them.

If one were to compare the frosty genitals of a penguin to the heat of the summer months, one would find the genitals to be considerably cooler than the season's temperatures. But not Big Boi, as he explains on this 2012 solo song. He is cooler than that.

Freddie Jackson Sipping a Milkshake in a Snowstorm

Song: "So Fresh, So Clean"

American soul singer Freddie Jackson was an important artist in the '80s and early '90s. He broke into the music world in 1985, making a splash with back-to-back hits "Rock Me Tonight" and "You Are My Lady." His soulful talent and slick style of dress would be defined by many as "cool."

A milkshake is a sweetened beverage that is served cold, often made with ice cream and milk. It was introduced to the world in the early 1900s, finding great popularity by 1930 or so. It is considered by many to be refreshing on a hot day, due to its low serving temperature.

A snowstorm is a weather event characterized by large amounts of snowfall. As discussed above, snow is cold, requiring temperatures to fall at least as low as 32 degrees Fahrenheit in order to exist.

Therefore, Freddie Jackson sipping a milkshake in a snowstorm would be an event that many would agree is "cool." But, surprise, not Outkast, as Big Boi states in this song from 2000's Stankonia.

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Our prophet asked us to tell others at least a verse of the quran: فَبِمَا رَحْمَةٍ مِنَ اللَّهِ لِنْتَ لَهُمْ ۖ وَلَوْ كُنْتَ فَظًّا غَلِيظَ الْقَلْبِ لَانْفَضُّوا مِنْ حَوْلِكَ ۖ فَاعْفُ عَنْهُمْ وَاسْتَغْفِرْ لَهُمْ وَشَاوِرْهُمْ فِي الْأَمْرِ ۖ فَإِذَا عَزَمْتَ فَتَوَكَّلْ عَلَى اللَّهِ ۚ إِنَّ اللَّهَ يُحِبُّ الْمُتَوَكِّلِينَ 3:159 And by the Mercy of Allah, you dealt with them gently. And had you been severe and harsh-hearted, they would have broken away from about you; so pass over (their faults), and ask (Allah's) Forgiveness for them; and consult them in the affairs. Then when you have taken a decision, put your trust in Allah, certainly, Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him). 5:90 يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا إِنَّمَا الْخَمْرُ وَالْمَيْسِرُ وَالْأَنْصَابُ وَالْأَزْلَامُ رِجْسٌ مِنْ عَمَلِ الشَّيْطَانِ فَاجْتَنِبُوهُ لَعَلَّكُمْ تُفْلِحُونَ O you who believe! Intoxicants (all kinds of alcoholic drinks), gambling, Al-Ansab, and Al-Azlam (arrows for seeking luck or decision) are an abomination of Shaitan's (Satan) handiwork. So avoid (strictly all) that (abomination) in order that you may be successful. كُلُّ نَفْسٍ ذَائِقَةُ الْمَوْتِ ۗ وَإِنَّمَا تُوَفَّوْنَ أُجُورَكُمْ يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ ۖ فَمَنْ زُحْزِحَ عَنِ النَّارِ وَأُدْخِلَ الْجَنَّةَ فَقَدْ فَازَ ۗ وَمَا الْحَيَاةُ الدُّنْيَا إِلَّا مَتَاعُ الْغُرُورِ 3:185 Everyone shall taste death. And only on the Day of Resurrection shall you be paid your wages in full. And whoever is removed away from the Fire and admitted to Paradise, he indeed is successful. The life of this world is only the enjoyment of deception (a deceiving thing). ********* وَمِنَ النَّاسِ مَنْ يَتَّخِذُ مِنْ دُونِ اللَّهِ أَنْدَادًا يُحِبُّونَهُمْ كَحُبِّ اللَّهِ ۖ وَالَّذِينَ آمَنُوا أَشَدُّ حُبًّا لِلَّهِ ۗ وَلَوْ يَرَى الَّذِينَ ظَلَمُوا إِذْ يَرَوْنَ الْعَذَابَ أَنَّ الْقُوَّةَ لِلَّهِ جَمِيعًا وَأَنَّ اللَّهَ شَدِيدُ الْعَذَاب ********************* 47:36: The life of the world is but a sport and a pastime. And if ye believe and ward off (evil). He will give you your wages, and will not ask of you your wordly wealth. 57:20: Know that the life of the world is only play, and idle talk, and pageantry, and boasting among you, and rivalry in respect of wealth and children; as the likeness of vegetation after rain, whereof the growth is pleasing to the husbandman, but afterward it drieth up and thou seest it turning yellow, then it becometh straw. And in the Hereafter there is grievous punishment, and (also) forgiveness from Allah and His good pleasure, whereas the life of the world is but matter of illusion.

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