The 10 Best Songs by Bad Musicians

Categories: Lists

Jim-Morrison-the-doors.jpg
Via Wiki Commons
Stopped clocks are right twice a day. Geoffrey Arend is married to Christina Hendricks. Performance artists get federal funding. Canada is south of Detroit. People wear Google Glass and think they look awesome. Some things you just can't explain, like how really shitty bands occasionally luck into recording splendid songs. To wit, here are the 10 greatest songs ever recorded by not-so-great musicians:

See also: Six Punk Bands We Don't Need To Talk About Anymore


"Apologize," One Republic
Ryan Tedder is a hit-making robot in the worst sense imaginable. Crafting melodies with the sole objective of charting, he's a pop-music panderer, whether for his own band or the slew of sellouts he produces for. But here's the thing about pop music: Bad as the listening public's taste can be at times, sometimes mass affection is warranted. "Apologize" is one of the times they--and Tedder--got it totally right. The song is reminiscent of Chuck and Blair locking eyes from across a crowded club in Gossip Girl. There's just nothing more emotionally gripping.



"Boogie In Your Butt," Eddie Murphy
This might be the most sophomoric song ever recorded. The lyrics--clearly the fruits of an extremely inebriated green-room conversation--consist of Murphy rapping about shoving a bunch of disparate objects that rhyme into a rectum. ("Put a telephone in your butt/ Put a dinosaur bone in your butt.") But(t), in a still-on-the-rise (this was '82) Murphy's hands, it's infectiously hilarious, and the backing band is funky, like Morris Day loaned Murphy the Time for the night.



"Demons," Imagine Dragons
Taking the baton from Limp Bizkit, Imagine Dragons seem to operate under the mistaken impression that relentlessly cranking everything up to 11 magically makes music better. Except on "Demons," where Dan Reynolds backs the verses into methodical Coldplay territory before the chorus explodes. Somehow it works.



"Alone," Heart
The Wilson sisters are rightfully hailed as feminist trailblazers in what was then a rock landscape completely immersed in testosterone. But that doesn't mean their music was any good. Yet on Heart's most powerful of power ballads, "Alone," all the melodramatic guitar-lickin' works, and the chorus' come-on is oh-so-steamy.



"Drops of Jupiter," Train
This song has been so mercilessly overplayed since it was released 13 years ago (!) that you'd be forgiven for considering it annoying. But that's not Train's fault. "Drops of Jupiter" could be 99.9 percent trash and it would still be redeemed by the amazing line, "The best soy latte that you ever had and me." But the tune, masterfully paced and lyrically ballsy, isn't trash. It's actually pretty good, unlike the balance of Train's discography.



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107 comments
Richard Brown
Richard Brown

Whoever thought up that idea "I tell you, I tell you, I tell you he must die, I tell you he must die." Haha

Kzinga Kanoelani
Kzinga Kanoelani

Okay, but who are they to say what's good and what's bad in the first place? Everyone has their own taste. Many of these songs on this list I think are great. For VV to post this is just feeding into the whole music snob mentality. It's revolting. Also, the doors are a classic and revolutionary group of the sixties. Don't agree with this at all

Michael Zvirblis
Michael Zvirblis

I once read that they were better than some 60's bands cause of their muscianship.

Joe Sky
Joe Sky

This is why the voice is on it's last legs. Once a wonderful source of real journalism, now reduced to just another clickbait site.

Nalini Singh
Nalini Singh

If it wasn't for the music of The Doors. I don't think Jim would have been as popular as he was. He has a presence. A rock star attitude. Not the best voice but still a superstar.

Robert Elder
Robert Elder

They will be remembered-you not so much. I will light my fire with your article.

Brian DeRosa
Brian DeRosa

Bay Area mid sixties where they shunned the surfer and folk sound movements. They gravitated between pop and avant-garde because that's what sold records. They have a place, but certainly not garbage.

Michael M Adkins
Michael M Adkins

You've ran this trash article twice. I'm removing this hack from my page.

Frank Gentile
Frank Gentile

I remember when I used to buy the V.V. every week for about 20 years, back in the '70s and '80s, when it was actually still relevant. It's a piece of crap now.

Frank Gentile
Frank Gentile

P.S. Coming from someone with a gay porn actors name..Lol.

Frank Gentile
Frank Gentile

I'm a "fag" and I am a lifelong lover of The Doors.

Johnny Spin
Johnny Spin

Those are all pretty horrible songs. Honestly "Break On Through" is the only one that isn't shit. This guy has horrible taste.

Marbles Mahoney
Marbles Mahoney

So much for taste at Voice. You just lost a subscriber.

Nick Doshner
Nick Doshner

LOL awesome headline. Doors were a good band at the right time. Not a great one.

Christian Wells
Christian Wells

I'm really getting tired of revisionism being "a thing." Merely being a contrarian does not make you clever.

Doc Leesson
Doc Leesson

If that asshole thinks the Doors are garbage, there's no need to read his article. He's obviously deaf.

Jamar Jackson
Jamar Jackson

:-o ! this is defnietly a dumbass thing to say by the Village Voice MIKE SEELY whoever the f*ck he is dosen't Knows shit about music ! no one can play keys and piano like RAY MANZAREK melodies and bass at the same time ! village Voice is lame for having shitty writers on their Newpaper ! Suck a D !

Dave Yan
Dave Yan

First and last time I waste time reading a post from this source.

Mitchell Sternbach
Mitchell Sternbach

Apparently the VV is now completely irrelevant and yes, real garbage. RIP, VV. You're now dead to me. This is sheer idiocy. "Bad musicians?" "Garbage?" You have nothing to offer, do you?

Peter Gracia
Peter Gracia

...and the Voice is irrelevant! #mrmojorisin

Ted Cantu
Ted Cantu

Who cares what you think.... you guys write shit

Jeffrey Becker
Jeffrey Becker

Why do you keep pushing articles written by this hack writer who knows nothing about music?

Emily Deason Glass
Emily Deason Glass

How on Earth can the Doors be lumped in with this list? This is absurd! The Doors had so many songs that were great in addition to Break on Through. The End, Backdoor Man, and Hello, I Love You to just name a few! I don't know what village this is the voice of but it would seem the village idiot wrote this article!

Tom Burton
Tom Burton

Seely your full of shit Completely full of shit

Mark Riordan
Mark Riordan

Maybe Mike Seely should try writing and performing a song.

Larry Montozzi
Larry Montozzi

Are you kidding ? You put the doors on this shit list? You must be a failed musician.

Punky Munrue
Punky Munrue

This is an OLD article. It seems they realize it pisses people off, but they get a lot of attention for re-posting it every week. So not only are they bitches, they're unoriginal bitches. A "top-10 list"? Really? Come into work hungover that day and decided to take the easy way out? Pussy.

Eamon Loingsigh
Eamon Loingsigh

What an ignorant thing to post, Doors, garbage? That's why you guys aspire to mainstream media rabble.

Michael Bodnar
Michael Bodnar

Any music writer that does not recognize the artistic merit of The Doors -- regardless of their personal taste -- is not qualified to be a music writer.

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