Important Life Advice from Tyler, the Creator


Many celebrities take to the streets of Twitter on a daily basis to bless the world with their unfiltered opinions, ideas, and Instagram photos. But none handle the task of advising the masses quite as eloquently and effectively as Odd Future's Tyler, the Creator. Check out the life lessons he has rolled out to his 1.8 million Twitter followers over the past month.

See also: Tyler, the Creator's WOLF, Reviewed By Tyler, the Creator

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Guess The Tweet: @LanaDelRey Or @Horse_Ebooks?

Say what you will about Lana Del Rey—and boy, have you ever, Internet—even her most devoted fans would be hard-pressed to call her "profound." Amidst the embarrassing-for-everybody controversy over her Saturday Night Live performance, her lips, her name, her dad, her shelved first album and whether or not she actually likes video games (per an MTV interview: nope), the stone that is her Twitter feed has largely been left unturned. It's full of perky @ replies, album news and the sort of "meaningful," punctuation-challenged platitudes that you generally find on the Facebook walls of people who had kids right after high school.

But! Is Del Rey's zombie-eyed thought catalog so strange and robotic that you'd mistake it for a bizarrely compelling spambot designed to sell ebooks about horses? Is Lana our next inexplicably profound Internet muse? Is she smarter than the seemingly sentient @horse_ebooks, and more importantly, can you tell them apart? We're guessing no—but you're welcome to try. Below, you'll find tweets from both, presented verbatim. Don't cheat! If you can identify 1-5, you've probably never heard of Hipster Runoff and should congratulate yourself; 6-10, you're a reasonable, Internet-savvy adult; 11-15, have you even left your apartment this week? Call your mother, she's worried about you.

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Kanye West's New Workout Plan For The Creative Class: DONDA

Last night Kanye West thrillingly returned to Twitter in a blaze of glory, sending out a series of 140-character missives over the course of a few hours that outlined recent happenings in his life (firing his agent; getting in a snit over creative differences while in negotiations to work on the filmed adaptation of The Jetsons) and his vision for the future. He confessed that he hadn't bought any new jewelry or cars because he instead wanted to pursue his artistic dreams. He had an existential crisis about the Grammys. He talked about his problems with French taxation rules.

But the bulk of his chatter was about DONDA, the new design-it-all company that he's founding—and he offered his 5.9 million followers a chance to work side-by-side with him, provided they were skilled in one of, well, many professions.

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Q&A: Rock And Roll Tedium's Craig Hamilton On Mick Jagger Browsing The Frozen-Food Aisle And Other Ways Stars Are Just Like Us

Not a picture of Mick Jagger at the grocery store.
Most people have a story about meeting someone famous—and most of those stories are dull. So why is an entire Tumblr site devoted to the most banal ones—"Did I ever tell you about the time... ?" is the header, but it's better known by its URL, Rock and Roll Tedium—such a riot? The deadpan tone has a lot to do with it—thrilling tales about nearly killing Neil Finn's Dalmatian ("It went around the other side of my bike from Neil as he was crossing the road, and it nearly got tangled. I had to stop for a bit"), being waved to by Badly Drawn Boy (and, conversely, failing to nod back at Jimmy Page), and stealing food from rock stars (shoving Van Morrison aside to get some cakes, stealing chips from John Oates) are short, to the point, and swim with everyday absurdity.

Launched by Englishman Craig Hamilton on December 17, the site quickly went viral by gently puncturing myths (Lisa Loeb "didn't really wear glasses," according to someone who once fetched her a guitar strap) and reducing legends to schlubs (at an L.A. Trader Joe's, the Doors' John Densmore "was buying a LOT of cat food") without an ounce of rancor. SOTC spoke with Hamilton via Skype last Thursday.

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Here Is A Supercut Of Every Time Wu-Tang Clan Shouts Itself Out On Its Albums

Thumbnail image for wutangninedemo.jpg
Presented for your enjoyment and compiled by one Conor Lastowka: An audio supercut of every time the Wu-Tang Clan shouts itself out—by its collective name or individually—across the group's five studio albums. Lastowka spent "a few hours" putting together the clip, and he came to this conclusion, which might not surprise you: "They say Wu-Tang a lot. It peaks with 36 Chambers, still gets brought up a lot on Forever, and sort of trickles out by the last two. I guess they really wanted to establish who they were. Note that I tried not to include repeated hooks like on 'Wu-Tang Clan Ain't Nuthing to F With' or 'High as Wu-Tang Get' just because they sounded repetitive, and there were still plenty without them." Noted. Clip below!

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If You Have An Inordinate Amount Of Time Or Patience, You Can Listen To The 24-Hour Flaming Lips Song (Or At Least Some Of It) Now

The 24-hour song's physical package. Ooh, a USB cable!
The Flaming Lips' "7 Skies H3"—the 24-hour song that's the band's Halloween present to its most persistent/unscheduled fans—is currently streaming at the creatively named right now, although if you want to hear it there's a bit of a catch; the virtual doors to the listening party get shut after 999 people enter, a paltry number when you think about how many people will just want to dip in and out during the Halloween workday. (How many people of those 999, I wonder, are in it for the long haul, and have been since the song dropped at midnight?)

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Remember John Peel With A Spin Through The PeelPlayer, Which Will Send You Down A Rabbit Hole Of Fantastic Indie

Pulp's "Babies," No. 23 on the 1994 Festive Fifty
The late BBC DJ John Peel unexpectedly passed away seven years ago today, leaving behind a legacy of inimitable musical curiosity and knowledge that reverberated throughout the world—even in the pre-internet era. Since then, the day's been unofficially dubbed John Peel Day by people who want his spirit to live on; I just spent an hour or so honoring his memory by tooling around just-launched website the Peelplayer, which contains streams (usually via YouTube) of tracks from every year-end top 50 singles list—known as the Festive Fifty—put together by the late legend. The full series of lists is online here, but it's way much more fun to skip around and find (or rediscover) gems from the vaults like this, this, and this. (And if you want to relive some of his Peel Sessions, when he brought artists into the studio and had them play a few songs, the Scritti Politti fansite Bibbly-O-Tek has a few excellent ones from that band.)

Missed Oneida's ATP Jam Session? Listen To It Online Now

Benjamin Lozovsky
... and even if you were present for all of the Ocropolis III, Oneida's extended improvisation at last weekend's All Tomorrow's Parties Presents I'll Be Your Mirror festival down in Asbury Park, it's worth revisiting the day via NPR's archive of the whole shebang, which is split into three parts should you want to dip in and out. Guests included Yo La Tengo/Dump's James McNew, Portishead's Geoff Barrow and Adrian Utley, Greg Fox, and more! (And really, if you stayed in Asbury Lanes for the entire time and got to experience it as it happened you are awesome and I am kind of jealous of you.)

David Lee Roth To Bring His Life To Life On The Web

This week in Internet news that should up the online world's overall quotient of "bozedy bozedy bop"s: David Lee Roth has joined Twitter and Facebook. So far all that the accounts have on them is a lot of teaser text and a link to the Van Halen singer/former radio host's official site, but a look at the source code reveals a couple of things! Alas, none of them seem to be a plan to launch DaveTV (as seen above in the all-parody-everything video for "Just A Gigolo/I Ain't Got Nobody") on some digital tier of a cable system... at least not yet.

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Celebrate National Taco Day With A Brand-New Round Of Album Tacos

Who among us doesn't get orally fixated on tacos?
As part of this country's apparently recent Let's Celebrate Each Foodstuff Available For Consumption One Day At A Time initiative—one that's helped along promotion-wise by things like, say, blogs looking for news hooks on which they can peg content—today is National Taco Day, a day to celebrate things being wrapped in tortillas and seasoned with cilantro, onions, etc. etc. (Just none of that from-a-packet stuff, OK? It's loaded with sodium!) In honor of this momentous holiday, the folks behind the blog Album Tacos—which takes boring old album covers and spices them up with deliciousness (well, and Photoshop)—put up a slew of new entries worth your perusal/appetite-stoking this afternoon, including entries from Jawbreaker, Lady Gaga, and Duran Duran. (Also: Poor Fergie.) Mmmm. Who wants to order in?

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