Mike Logan and Lennie Briscoe: Not so into rap-metal.

The news that Law & Order: Criminal Intent would be ripping all those headlines about the struggles of Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark for an upcoming episode was notable for its lightning-quick turnaround time, and for its fictionalized take on one of rock's biggest characters: Bono. According to TVLine's Michael Ausiello, "Arno" (seriously) will be "a secretly bisexual rock-star composer who's cheating on the missus with a colleague." (But will he wear big glasses?)

This bit of news inspired a look back at all the times that shows within the Law & Order version of New York City have taken on music-related topics. After the jump, six (in honor of the dearly departed original version's cast roster) of the ones that stuck out the most.

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Optimo and their fans, up all night. Pics by Chris, more below.

The Bunker's Eighth Anniversary
With Optimo, Donato Dozzy, and Derek Plaslaiko
1/7/10 at Public Assembly

Better than: Watching Antony Hopkins play Hitler in The Bunker.

Any party in New York that reaches even its first anniversary deserves a celebratory bash. So one can imagine how debauched the Bunker's yearly celebrations have gotten now that they're on their eighth. Started by Bryan Kasenic (DJ Spinoza) in the early '00s, the dance-music party has consistently brought the best underground DJs to town well before they blew up on an national or international level: Akufen, Marcel Dettmann, Anthony "Shake" Shakir, Octave One, Christian Vogel, and M.A.N.D.Y. have all played the multi-room, multi-floor shindig. At last year's birthday fete, it was decided that this year's anniversary guests should spin eight-hour sets, so that is exactly what we get tonight: Optimo in the front room and Donato Dozzy in the back room both go from 10 p.m. to 6 a.m., while Derek Plaslaiko reigns from 4 a.m. to 12 p.m. in the loft. Come on out, 14-hour party people, this one's for you.

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Apparently it was a good time. Pics by Jeff Meltz/THECULTUREOFME, more below.

Brooklyn Electronic Music Festival
Music Hall of Williamsburg/Public Assembly
Saturday, December 18

Better than: Last year's. (Seriously.)

A beer exploded on Public Assembly's stage Saturday night. It was a party trick in this case --- a direct result of "Samir's Theme" booming through the speakers of the club's grimy back room and one girl's resulting need to spastically jump around while holding her half-opened beverage. Three people were caught in the foamy downpour, though the only one who noticed cheered while shaking her hair dry; Star Eyes, the DJ and instigator of it all, likewise remained totally clueless behind her turntables. Multiply that by a couple hundred and you've got this year's Brooklyn Electronic Music Festival.

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Kylesa's Laura Pleasants, mid-wail. Pics by Rob, more below.

Kylesa/Hull
Public Assembly
Monday, October 25

Better than: Watching Tony Romo get knocked out for the season on Monday Night Football, which is saying something.

You know you're in for some shit when you walk in the club and there are three full drum kits onstage. The first belongs to Brooklyn's own Hull, a five-man Sabbathian monolith of slow-headbanging fury, occasionally breaking into a jump-cut double-time gallop but more comfortable when gradually roiling to a deliberate, rumbling, drum-fill-heavy, hypnotizing boil, each tune moody and violent and miniseries-length, with loud parts so loud you can't think straight and quiet parts so quiet you can hear the drummer loudly exhaling. Between songs they earnestly thank us for Supporting the Scene and sheepishly admit that one of their guitarists (Carmine, I think) was headbanging so hard he threw his back out. Consider that an omen.

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We haven't talked much about it here, but the Georgia-based, double-drumming, psych-metal wrecking crew Kylesa have made one of the better records of the year in Spirit Shadow, their improbably melodic (Built To Spillish, even!) fifth (!) album. It comes out tomorrow, after which it will surely begin what we predict will be a swift climb up various critic's year-end best-of lists. In the meantime, you can see them tonight, in a just announced, Brooklyn Vegan-sponsored surprise show at Public Assembly. They played Webster last night with High on Fire (hence tonight's secrecy), and it looked pretty incredible:

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Guess which member of Set Aflame has the most involved hair-care regimen. Pic by Dan.

Meek Is Murder/Set Aflame/Bandladeafy/Psycho Enhancer
Public Assembly
Tuesday, August 10

After the crushing disappointment of last week's canceled Destroyer 666 show, Tuesday night's affair at Brooklyn's Public Assembly provided some small amount of solace and relief. Though none of the bands fit the pure-metal bullet-belts-and-leather aesthetic of those sorely missed Aussie black-thrashers, each of the four acts managed to offer up some kind of musical extremity, be it brute force or mind-boggling bass wizardry.

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Matt Sonzala

Invincible (right) and Waajeed to the rescue.

Invincible/Senor Kaos/DJ Spinna
Public Assembly
Tuesday, October 20

There's a few things you can count on at an "underground" hip-hop show with absolute, painful certainty: an overwhelming number of guys in city-reppin' fitted caps, much aimless standing about, and a hoard of flyer-hustling promoters haplessly luring you to the next gig. Needless to say, last night's High Water Music CMJ showcase, featuring DJ Spinna, Fresh Daily, Senor Kaos, Daniel Joseph, and Homeboy Sandman, boasted all of the above. Snuck into the mix too was Detroit femme-emcee extraordinaire Invincible, and thank god for that.

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