In 2012, nothing was as popular as being massively boring. Frank Ocean drained the sexiness and excitement out of r&b, to widespread critical acclaim. Lana Del Rey sighed listlessly over string arrangements in a tight dress, like some kind of Kristen Wiig character who stumbled out of the Holodeck and into real life (to mix my references a bit), and sold an indecent number of records. Gotye's "Somebody I Used to Know" was the year's biggest single (number one on radio, digital downloads, and Spotify); it was a song about a bad break up recorded by an Australian in a barn over a spare arrangement on a xylophone . What the hell is wrong with you people?
"Hi. I'm boring."