Drop a ball on Times Square! Drop a bomb on Gaza!
You'd think this would be a time of celebration, or at least some happy whistling to ourselves as we sweep out Dick Cheney's accumulated droppings from the past eight years.
But the dropping's not done, and the deepest suffering is yet to come, as the fallout from Wall Street's wreckage turns from flurries tonight on Times Square into a blizzard next year throughout the country.
It figures that Arctic temps are swooping in to make this an especially cold night in the city.
Global warning: It's hot in the Middle East, where bombs are dropping on Gaza (with Mayor Mike Bloomberg's support). And, to put it mildly, it's intemperate elsewhere: Aside from the numerous places like the auto junkyard in Detroit, builders and contractors will soon be dropping even those skilled workers who never drop tools. At this rate, things will be so bad by next Christmas that even Jesus's dad wouldn't be able to get a carpentry gig.
The shakes aren't typically a warning sign of an onrushing depression, but everybody's got them, especially bosses. The city's dropping Snapple from its vending machines, and one of Mike Bloomberg's aides is dropping his feverish P.R. campaign to give Princess Caroline Kennedy the vacant Senate seat. (See the Post's "MIKE'S AIDE COOLING HIS CAROLINE PUSH."
A whole lotta droppin' goin' on. As usual, few of those who are dropping the ball aren't themselves getting dropped.
And then there are those millions of Americans who wish that Bernie Madoff would simply drop dead. If it does happen, I hope it's on my watch.
Now it turns out, as the Madoff yarn keeps unraveling, that his outrageous behavior is dearly costing a slew of organizations like Human Rights Watch and Human Rights First (see this Bloomberg list), in addition to the big and small charities we already knew about.
So, Happy New Year to civil libertarians everywhere!
Madoff's not the only source of grief. Many journalists are being dropped every day — prompting a jeremiad (in both senses of the word) for Nat Hentoff, a modern-day Jeremiah who I'm pretty sure was a contemporary of the prophet himself. (For Hentoff, I'll drop an IBM Selectric typeball tonight in Times Square; it's the most I can do.)
Whatever you drop, hang onto your laptop. You need it to click on these stories ...
NO PARTICULAR ORDER:
N.Y. Times: 'Glamour Still Rules, but With Fewer Debutantes'
Crain's New York Business: 'Foreclosure suit filed against developers'
N.Y. Daily News: 'Gaza Strip invasion is right thing to do, Mike Bloomberg says'
Jewish Daily Forward: 'Even With Aid, Groups Scramble To Cope With Post-Madoff Mess'
N.Y. Post: '"SOFT" DRINK SALES: CITY YANKING SNAPPLE'
Crain's New York Business: 'Big projects mask declines in construction spending'
N.Y. Post: 'CONEY GRINCH BOOTS BOUTIQUE'
Crain's New York Business: 'Yeshiva revises Madoff losses to just $14.5M'
N.Y. Times: 'SAT Changes Policy, Opening Rift With Colleges'
Jewish Daily Forward: 'YouTube Yanks Israeli Army Videos'
N.Y. Post: 'SPINNING WHEELS OF JUSTICE'
N.Y. Times: 'Still Paging Mr. Salinger'
N.Y. Times: 'As Another Memoir Is Faked, Trust Suffers'
N.Y. Times: 'Films Reach Theaters a Drib Here, Drab There'
N.Y. Daily News: 'CHURCH-FLEECE PONZI RAP'