George W. Bush Depreciates Like A Ford Taurus

Categories: The Worst Ever

BushTaurus_final.jpg
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Text and Illustration by Paul Mack

Like a rock.

Not long after national icon Bob Seger began singing those words, Chevrolet licensed the song to sell its line of heavy-duty trucks. Not to be outdone, GOP supporters hijacked it for their iconic leader, the perfect anthem for the decisive decider, the heavy-duty doer.

However, further analysis shows that, rather than sharing traits with a Chevy truck, George W. Bush is actually better represented by a Ford sedan.

Given that an approval rating is a measure of the value constituents place on a politician—much the same way that a Kelly Blue Book price reflects the value used car markets place on an older vehicle—turns out that President George W. Bush has depreciated at the same rate as a four-door Ford Taurus purchased new at the time of his inauguration.

George W. Bush. Built Ford tough. Ford Taurus tough.


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