Mile High Club: Get Married (or Committed/Affirmed) Free at ESB!

As lifestyle news articles tell us, in times of uncertainty people tend to get hitched. Of course, in the coming Depression, a lot of us won't be able to afford lavish nuptials. So if you plan to cleave unto, why not try and get Conde Nast's Brides.com to host your ceremony -- on top of the Empire State Building, and on Valentine's Day, no less.

As they do every year, Brides.com is soliciting stories from prospective high-altitude conjugators about how they they met, how he or she popped the question, and their "connection" to the Empire State Building and "why you think it's the perfect place to get married." They'll pick 14 lucky couples for a free "intimate" (up to 20 guests) ceremony, at which winners can "marry, renew their vows or affirm their commitment." And yes, their publicist assures us, that means same-sex couples are eligible.

Consultations with Brides.com editors, hair and makeup styling, a champagne toast, and a gift bag worth over $500 thrown in -- a $7,500 value. Hell, for that, we know some couples who'll tell you why the roof of Streit's Matzoh is the perfect place for a wedding.

If you need hints on how to mack this competition, reminiscences from previous winners appear in this Daily News article. "We used to sit in our apartment together and watch the colors changing on the Empire State," goes one. "The building's been central to our lives together." Get the idea? Give ESB some love and it may love you back. Entries are due by the end of October 24.