Photos of Nude Politician Found to Be Photos of Nude Nobody

hansonnude.jpgPauline Hanson is an Australian politician, formerly leader of Pauline Hanson's One Nation Party and now leader of Pauline's United Australia Party. Well, it worked for Newman's Own Salad Dressing. As you may have gathered from the code words in her brand names, Hanson has been a bit edgy on matters of race, which may explain why someone got Jack Johnson to disseminate via the Sunday Telegraph nude photos that he claimed were of Hanson, taken long ago when he and the former "fish and chip shop lady" were intimate. Jackson portrayed their romance touchingly: "I started chatting up this young bird... I had the best Harley in town. That's why she was keen on me... We booked into the swankiest place I'd ever seen. We had a ball," etc.

Lovely story, but apparently untrue: Hanson denied the photos were of her and offered to expose her belly button to prove it. Both Hanson's sister and a forensic photography expert support her claim. Jackson began to show less certainty of the identity of his former bedmate, though his charm has persisted: "If there is another Pauline out there, if it is this person, I'm asking for her to come out too and slap my face and say, 'That was me, you mongrel.''' Hanson's suing and has lodged a complaint with the press council, and people are laughing at the Telegraph and Jackson. So Hanson should be Australia's first female Fuehrer soon enough. All's well that ends well!


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